Evagurl Izma

Naimians' 05 Weddings

2012-02-11T19:14:00.000-08:00

Sedar tak sedar we already reached the age of 24. Ramai ouh schoolmates yang dah kahwin. Yang dapat baby pun dah ada 3-4 orang. Rasa macam dah makin tua. Haihhhhh. Kalau boleh saya tak mahu jadi dewasa. Sobss ..

Dalam semua wedding schoolmates, satu pun tak dapat pergi sebab selalu timing tu clash ngan benda lain. Tengah final exam la, practical la, tak dapat balik kampung la, la la la dan la. Very frustrated! Huuuu T.T

Tapi takpe lah. Hopefully nanti dapat pergi wedding yang next. Insha Allah. Disebabkan tak dapat pergi wedding diorang yang lepas, so entry kali ni special untuk kawan-kawan yang tersayang. Dapat tengok dan simpan gambar diorang pun jadi la kan. =)

Khairatul Farah - classmate mase form 4. Farah ni jenis yang kelakar, kuat gelak jugak dalam kelas. Sekarang dia ngan husband dia kat Mesir kalau tak silap. Bakal menjadi ibu tak lama lagi *wink*

Iman - Orangnye kecik comel je. Suka tengok muka die, so sweet. Wedding die simple but nice. Suka tengok. Iman ni antara best students batch kitorang. Daripada keluarga doktor dan bakal menjadi seorang doktor jugak.

Hani Ajrina - yang paling latest kahwin. Sedih gile tak dapat pegi sebab dah janji nak pegi. Sobsss.. Tapi nak wat camne, time tu memang nazak gile takleh balik Kelantan. Sorry Hani! Huhu.. Hani ni salah seorang kawan yang muka macam chinese look, putih melepak. Agaknye memang ade mix ngan chinese kot. Wedding die pun simple, but she look gorgeous in dark green! Sesuai dengan diorang. *smile*

Sa'adah - classmates masa form 5. Presiden Badan Dakwah dan Rohani. Masa sekolah dulu selalu mintak tunjuk ajar dan nasihat dari Adah lagi-lagi kalau bab agama. Lembut je orangnye, sopan dan sejuk mata memandang. Oh seriously rindu zaman sekolah, zaman yang selalu dengar tazkirah dan hal-hal agama... :'(

Yarn - Antara gadis cantik yang aku pernah jumpa. Yarn ni tinggi, kurus dan sweet sangat. Dulu die ni jenis sempoi macam yang lain jugak. Tapi sekarang Yarn dah berubah, melangkah ke jalan muslimah sejati. Alhamdulillah... Syukur.. Oh Yarn pun bakal menjadi seorang ibu tak lama lagi. Tak sabar nak tengok, mesti sweet macam ummi die jugak ;-)

Zie - ni kawan yang agak rapat jugak la. Satu kelas masa form 5, lepas sekolah pun still contact lagi. Siap dia datang tido kat maktab lagi time foundation dulu. Huhu. Zie ni jenis rilek and cool je sepanjang masa. Agak sporting dan gila-gila. Suka pakai tudung bawal hitam. Haha. Takleh blah. Rindu kat ko ah Zie, tak sangka kejap je masa berlalu. Tup-tup dah jadi isteri orang. Hee~

Dila - kawan yang mature dan baik. Antara yang paling awal kahwin, kira wakil batch kami la ni. Dah dapat cahaya mata dah seorang. Seronok je tengok si ibu ni upload gambar baby die. Huhu. Bahagialah mereka yang berkahwin awal kan =P

Kak Fae- Classmate Form 5 yang pendiam dan pemalu. Huhu. Selalu yang pendiam dan pemalu nila yang sampai seru awal dari kami yang bising ni. Haha. Kak Fae ni sopan je orangnya, kalau dalam kelas tiap masa dok wat kerja, jarang tengok dia berjalan sana sini macam aku. Kehkeh. Ehs baru perasan muka kak Fae ngan husband macam ada iras je. Phewwwittt~

Inoue- Pengawas yang agak tinggi dan putih, agak chinese look . Inoue ni budak pandai, kalau tak silap spm pun 12A. Seorang yang tak kedekut ilmu, kalau tak paham ape-ape tanya je die, mesti die akan ajar punye. Inoue ngan husband sama padan kan, bagai pinang dibelah empat. Eheh.

Dibah- seorang yang cinonet je, tapi suara die kuat lagi-lagi time gelak. Terkejut jugak bila dapat tau Dibah dah kahwin. Bertambah la sorang lagi ke kelab tidak menjadi single. Ahaa. Wedding die pun comel jugak macam tuannye.

Along Hafizah - Ni sorang lagi gadis kecil molek yang dah berkahwin. Haihh orang comel-comel ni ramai peminat rupanya. Laju je sampai seru diorang. Hehe. Husbang along pun comel macam dia jugak. Kan?

Actually ramai lagi batch aku yang dah kahwin, tapi ni je gambar yang aku ade. Tu pun cilok dari fb diorang. Haha. Ampun ya ampun!. So kepada kawan-kawan yang tiada dalam entry ini jangan terasa ek. Nanti akan di update entry lain pulak untuk geng-geng yang akan berkahwin tak lama lagi. Wuhuu~

Oh ada 2 orang lagi yang akan melangsungkan perkahwinan bulan 3 ni, pada hari yang sama pulak tu. Semoga dipermudahkan segalanya. Ameeennnn.

Asilah

Syuhada

Plz government tolong bgi cuti lama sket, nak kahwin. Ehs silap. Nak balikkkkkkk!!~

Dear Sister,

2012-02-02T08:56:00.000-08:00

I know its hard. I know you look at the pictures of models and celebrities and wonder why you can't look like them? I know it physically hurts to sometimes refrain yourself from plucking those brows or to put on that hijab and abhaya. I know how it feels when your best friends are extremely pretty (Mashallah) and you are standing next to them feeling like nothing. I know how much complements and attention can light up your face. I know sometimes you have to give up being able to wear a certain thing because it isn't appropriate. i know it gets hard to walk outside with no make up, with your natural face, thinking it's not good enough and all of your flaws are showing. I know.

You know what else I know? I know you are beautiful, regardless of what you think of yourself. I know that even the slightest inclination of pleasing Allah in yourself increases that beauty ten-fold and I know that even when Allah finds you beautiful, it's all that matters. You are not doing this for the world, remember? You are not even doing it for yourself.

Imagine your beauty on the Yawm al Akhirah when your face would be glowing and radiant with annur, when you would be more beautiful than the honor and you would realize that it was this world really wasn't worth the drool.

Dear sister, I'm proud of you.

got it from here. well said =)

A lil bit of something to share

2012-01-29T04:48:00.000-08:00

Got this from facebook.

We always ask God why we only find the wrong people, where is the right one for us? I do think the same, sometimes. But now I just pray for the best, I just hope that 'my Imam' will find me someday, and I believe that he'll be the best Imam for his Makmum. Ameennnnn...

Girls, la tahzan, just pray to Allah, He knows who's the best for you. Insha Allah :)

Under adversity

2012-01-28T08:09:00.000-08:00

I really need Him and him..

Emotional

2012-01-23T21:42:00.000-08:00

Lately I find that most of the things turn out in difficult ways, until I feel like giving up, and I just want to go to top of the hill, shout out loud and cry until the last drop of tears left.

First, this time will be my last practicum, so I really hope that I can do it well. Even though I was a bit blur at a first place when I came into the school, but I forced myself, I tried hard to adapt to the new culture. Still there's so much things go beyond my control. What else should I say? Sometimes I blame our education system, too much emphasize on exam. Our education is totally exam oriented. Pupils go to school for the sake of exam, not because of purpose for their own life. Pity them.

Second, since I was a bit unstable at that moment, I don't think I can be alone. All my friends went back to their hometown for Chinese New Year holidays, I really wanted to go home too, but all tickets to Kelantan had sold out. My mom didn't allow me to drive to Kelantan by myself since it was a 'heavy' jam and I might get cramped or stuck along the way. So I had to stay in Malacca, alone. Alone. Thus, I made a last minute decision to go to my friend house, somewhere in Vista Angkasa. I thought I might be able to relax my mind and rest after a whole week of not enough sleep. But then, I was totally wrong. With non-stop sounds of lrt, cars, people and etc, I got a big headache. Or I should consider it as migrain. I couldn't sleep, I kept hearing those sounds until morning, and it's like the rolling stone bumped into my head. At last, I drove back to Malacca.. Alone, again.

Third, I don't understand why Malaysian love to judge people because of their past. What do you feel when you want to ask for some advices from your friends who know you for quite a long time, then they kept blaming you, saying that "Haa tu laa, nak sangat jadi model kn dulu. Padan muka ko. Sekarang baru rasa." What the hell? After all, is that what I'm supposed to hear from them? Aren't they supposed to support me to change, not to make me down by telling my mistakes repeatedly and giving no advice at all. Yes, I was a sinner, being a model was a big sin I've ever made, as it make you to see me as the worst girl ever. But that was in the past. In the PAST. Can't you differentiate between the past, the present and the future? We are all human, so who are you to judge people? Durrhh.. Come on people!

Oh I really want to throw away this feeling... I want to be a better person. I wish to open a door of jannah for my father and my mother, complete half of deen of my future husband (don't know who he is), and become a good mother for my children. I need some guidances, I have to improve myself. I don't to want to be a loser someday, who lying on the bed, waiting for Malaikat Izrael to come with regret of life which will never be healed... No..

Btw, I think Shahid Kapoor is so handsome and sweet, don't you think so?

Thanks for reading! :-)

First Week

2012-01-20T08:48:00.000-08:00

When I first stepped in that school, I didn't think that this will be the school which I was dreaming for. Noisy pupils, 'kerek' teachers, fierce headmistress, hot weather and bla bla bla. The first day in school wasn't a happy day at all. I went home hopelessly.

Same goes to the second day. After I got my timetable, I entered Year 3 Arif. Truthfully speaking, I had a big problem of classroom management (classroom control). Boys ran here, ran there, girls kept talking, yet all of them turned the class to be a 'pasar borong'. They screwed up everything. Thus they made my stress level went to the up. Moreover, I didn't have an enough sleep as I needed to prepare those teaching aids, lesson plan, murals, portfolio and etc. Again, I went home with tears. Lots of things kept lingering in my mind. It's like.. I had no idea how I'm gonna handle everything in a short of time. AAaaaaaaaaaa

Hurm... with tons of other problems and troubles, I felt like I'd lost myself. Sometimes I hurt other's feelings until I didn't feel like talking to anyone, I just want to be alone. I wondered whether I was in the right profession. Should I give up then? What am I going to do if I quit? Then I got a phone call from my mom. After seeking for some advices, I thought I should change my mindset. Why should I be so serious with those pupils, why don't I see them, teach them with my heart?

After some preparation, I managed to change my plan, I organized the interesting activities in the class and they enjoyed it so much. Yay! Bravo. Give a big clap to myself *wink*. Although there are some other things which are not settled yet, every morning when I see my pupils, look into their sincere eyes, their smiles and laugh, all my pains have washed away. Yes, those pains are gone. My pupils - they are one of the reason why I'm still standing until now.. =)

Day 1 - Write their own sentences using the words given.
-_-

Aku dan Hostel #3 : Gelaran

2012-01-08T07:13:00.000-08:00

Masa tahun 2001, budak lelaki ngan perempuan tak bercampur. Kelas pun asing-asing dari form 1 sampai form 5. Setiap form ada 3 kelas untuk student pompuan dan 3 kelas untuk student lelaki. Tapi bila naik form 2, Abuya (Pengetua) start sistem baru. Dah takde sistem bilik darjah asing-asing ikut gender, semua kena bercampur. Aku kena masuk kelas 2 PE 3, kawan baik aku Ajah dapat masuk kelas lain. Nasib baik kelas form 2 tingkat paling atas dan setiap kelas bersebelahan. So takde la jauh sangat. Senang nak berjalan ke kelas lain jumpa member bergossip.

Permulaan aku di kelas baru tak begitu baik. Aku dah biasa belajar dalam kelas yang semua perempuan. Time prep nak landing ke, nak meniarap ke, nak berguling-guling ke takde sape kisah. Tapi lepas combine kelas tu sumpah rasa terkongkong dan tak bebas langsung. Semua benda nak kena jaga. Pergi prep tak pakai sarung kaki pun kena sound. Bising sket pun kena tegur suara tu aurat. Dah la time tu aku jenis anti lelaki. Haremm takde sorang pun budak laki kelas aku yang aku tegur. Tiap kali pandang diorang secara automatik aku terbayang muka diorang macam Undertaker.

Kedudukan kelas 2 PE 3

Ketua kelas aku, Naqiuddin seorang yang berdedikasi, perasan hensem dan selalu tido dalam kelas. Hisyham, pengawas berlesung pipit, selalu makan gula-gula dan suka pakai T-shirt hitam dan baju Melayu merah gelap. Raymi a.k.a Raymeow muka cute macam kucing. Tasha dan Nadia kawan baik dari form 1 lagi. Wani Bulat dan Jaa dua-dua kecik cinonet comel je. Hadri, seorang yang agak warak, pendiam dan sopan. Fathy, Ayu dan Aza gadis yang bejurus, lawa dan ayu, stok pilihan mak mertua untuk dibuat menantu. Perghh. Naim, si tinggi, putih, ramai peminat sebab die hensem macam Johnny Depp tapi mulut laser nak mampuih macam Maggi kari berapi letup. Sehari tak gaduh ngan aku memang tak sah. Ceit. Redha, seorang budak baik, bijak, innocent, memiliki hidung tinggi macam KLCC dan satu-satunya kawan baik lelaki aku time tu. Redha tak pernah gaduh, marah or melawan bila aku buli dia. Tiap kali dapat buku teks baru Redha la tukang balut semua buku teks aku. Bila homework aku tak siap, aku tiru Redha. Kalau aku bosan dalam kelas, Redha la mangsa yang kena kacau ngan aku. Paling tak leh blah aku selalu tanya; "Wei, mung rase aku comey macam Karishma Kapoor dop? Baik mu oyak comey, kalu dok siak mum!" Si Redha ni plak layan jee aku, cakap aku sebijik sejiban macam artis hindustan tu. Macam siot. Haha.

Sorang lagi, Faisyal, manusia yang paling suka cari pasal ngan aku. Kitorang panggil dia Pesa. Pesa ni selalu pedajal aku. Time aku lambat datang kelas, die ketuk 'duster' yang penuh dengan habuk kapur kat atas meja ngan kerusi aku. Habis melekat kat situ. Kadang-kadang dia letak chewing gum kt bawah meja aku. Buku-buku aku pun selalu kena sorok. Pendek kata hampir tiap masa aku naik hangin ngan mamat buncit sorang ni. Dahlah time aku siapkan homework ke, dok menulis ke, dia selalu pusing belakang dan pandang kat aku macam aku buat salah. Stok roti yang aku simpan dalam loker belakang pun selalu kena kebas ngan dia. Buku lyric lagu Backstreet Boys yang aku sorok pun habis dia conteng, wat lukis orang lidi.

Satu petang tu aku datang prep lewat. Aku tak perasan Pesa ada kat belakang aku. Masa aku nak duduk atas kerusi aku si Pesa tarik kerusi aku senyap-senyap. Tiba-tiba..

Bammmmm...

Tak pasal-pasal aku jatuh terduduk atas lantai. Syiokk je bontot aku cium lantai. Satu kelas gelakkan aku. Harem jadah aku mana la nak pandang belakang time nak duduk. Aku pun apalagi. Dengan muka merah padam aku bangun dan pandang dia. Kononnye nak kasi penumbuk ah. Dalam keadaan marah tu kening aku terangkat sebelah luar kesedaran kenormalan aku. Si Pesa ni yang tadinya muka cuak tiba-tiba gelak macam nak mati sambil cakap; 'Woi Kening ko terangkat macam The Rock (ahli gusti) woo, hahahahaha.'

Lagi kuat aku kena gelak ngan budak kelas aku. Pastu aku blah pi study kat kelas lain. Malas nak layan. Selepas itu tiap kali aku pegi mane-mane ade je orang buat sound 'If you smell...', pastu satu geng sambung 'What The Rock is cookingg!!' sambil ketawakan aku kuat-kuat. Siyesly aku rasa macam shit. Ni semua keje si Pesa. Pfffttt. Tapi lama-lama aku jadi biasa ngan ejekan diorang. Sampaikan ustaz B. Arab kelas aku pun panggil aku The Rock. Sejak hari tu nama aku bertukar dari Izma jadi The Rock, panggilan tu macam dah sebati ngan diorang. Even sekarang pun kalau time reunion kalau ada yang tanya mana Izma, sume pakat wat muka blurr. Bila sebut nama The Rock baru diorang ingat aku. Haha aisehmemm~

Paling tak tahan masa dapat majalah sekolah sebelum akhir tahun semua pakat sign autograph kat dalam majalah aku dengan ucapan If you smell what The Rock is cookinggg!~

budak lelaki batch aku

p/s: Aku teruja gile babem bile tengok video Faradyable alih suara The Rock. Hebat ouh! *tepuk tangan*

Klik untuk baca entry:

Aku dan Hostel #1
Aku dan Hostel #2

Aku dan Hostel #2 : Satu Malam

2012-01-07T06:39:00.000-08:00

Dulu aku memang suka tengok movie. Sanggup kumpul duit sebab nak beli video tape yang besaq kaler hitam macam beg nenek. Time tu mane ade cd lagi beb. Tapi bila masuk alam persekolahan mood nak bermovie makin kurang sebab aku ke sekolah berasrama. TV pun ada sebijik je diorang letak kat kantin. Jangankan movie, telenovela pun tak lepas tengok. Ada la jugak time prep petang aku ngan member aku, Ajah pi curi-curi tengok citer Rosalinda. Tu pun tak pernah dapat tengok lebih 5 minit sebab kena kejar dek warden kitorang, Cikgu Juka.

Ada sekali tu angin Cikgu Juka agak baik. Dia kasi permission kat budak-budak lelaki untuk tengok tayangan cerita Blok 404 dengan syarat kena tengok pada malam hujung minggu sebab takde prep. Masa tu memang femes pun cite tu sebab budak-budak yang dok kat rumah cakap best. Ape yang best pun aku tak taw. Aku la manusia paling excited bila taw pasal tayangan ni tapi aku tak puas hati sebab budak pompuan diorang tak kasi tengok. Budak lelaki je yang lepas. Aku pun apalagi. Start plan A ah. Aku ngan Ajah pegi jumpa abg Fazna dan Shahiru, ketua library kitorang yang incharge pasal tayangan ni. Setelah setengah jam pujuk rayu menangis meleleh depan diorang, baru abg-abg tu bagi kitorang join dengan syarat kitorang kena dok belakang sekali sebab kitorang je pelajar pompuan. Belakang pun belakang la bang. Asal dapat tengok.

Sebelum start tayangan tu, semua budak lelaki pandang kitorang semacam. Mcm kitorang kesah, wat derk je la. Jenis muka tak tau malu. Tapi diorang saje je nak kenakan kitorang. Budak-budak lelaki yang dok kat belakang saje je bangun dari kerusi dan tengok sambil berdiri sebab diorang tak nak bagi kitorang nampak. Jenis berlagak macam dinding plak nak halang pandangan kitorang. Dahla sorang sorang tinggi nak mampuih. Aku masa tu cinonet je, memang tak lepas ah nak tengok. Last-last aku ngan Ajah blah dari situ dengan perasaan bengang bercampur bangang.

Masa on the way nak balik hostel, kitorang kena lalu tangga hujung. Tepi tangga tu ada kabel a.k.a suis utama yang menyambungkan semua plak-plak dan wayar lampu di sekolah kitorang termasuk la plak TV yang tengah tayang cite tu. Dengan muka innocent dan idea bernas Ajah suruh aku tutup suis utama tu. Bila dah blackout tak yah mimpi ah diorang nak tengok cerita tu. Confirm meraung punye. Tiba-tiba..

Papppppppppp....

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...

Riuh suara budak-budak lelaki menjerit. Aku ngan Ajah lari pecut wo0 balik hostel sebelum diorang terserempak dengan kami. Nasib aku tak berapa baik sebab sorang budak form 4 ternampak aku pastu die menjerit bagitau kat semua orang. Ajah sempat lepas masuk hostel tapi aku kena kepung ngan semua budak aspura. Depa buat muka gangster mengalahkan taiko. Mana tak bengang. Cerita tu tinggal 15 minit lagi nak habis. Kalau 'on' suis elektrik tu balik, cd driver tu takleh rewind or forward sebab button die rosak. So nak tak nak diorang kena start tengok dari mula balik. Segala maki hamun sumpah seranah keluar dari mulut diorang. Ada senior form 5 yang bawak kayu lagi, kononnya nak gertak aku supaya takut. Aku tak nampak hape dah time tu, aku terbayang roti kismis kat bilik aku je sebab perut aku lapa gile seh. Dengan muka cute aku cakap kat diorang aku tak tau ape pun, kononnya aku baru je lalu kat situ. Haram jadah sape nak percaya statement genius aku. Dah terang-terang takde orang lain yang lalu kat kabel tu. Haha.

Suasana makin tegang bile sorang senior form 4 ni nak tampar aku tapi budak laki kelas aku sempat halang. Nasib baik abg Fazna dan abg Shahiru datang menteteramkan keadaan. Pastu diorang yang lepaskan aku pegi. Sampai kat hostel semua kawan pompuan aku dok tunggu dalam bilik. Ni mesti keje si Ajah bagitau kat diorang. Muka diorang 99x lagi cuak daripada aku. Walaweh. Aku slumber je masuk bilik minum Milo makan roti dan tido dengan tenang. Haha. Haha lagi -_-

Keesokannya aku kena panggil ke bilik Pengetua sebab hal semalam. Cikgu Juka pun ada sama dok tunggu dalam bilik Pengetua. Warden aku yang sorang ni memang dah lama suspek aku dalam kes naik aspura (klik utk rujuk entry naik aspura) tapi aku tak dapat dikenakan tindakan pape sebab takde bukti. Bila naik kes ni, dia la orang first pegi report kat Pengetua. Diorang contact parents aku suruh datang sekolah. Actually dah banyak kali Pengetua (kitorang panggil dia Abuya) kol parents aku sebab aku memang agak nakal kat sekolah. Kali ni ayah aku nekad nak datang dan tukarkan aku ke sekolah lain. Abuya tak kasi sebab Abuya memang baik ngan aku. Abuya cakap selagi aku tak lepas PMR, dia takkan bagi aku pindah sekolah, lagi satu dia cakap dia yakin aku akan score dlm PMR. Then dia bagitau kat semua kalau result PMR aku cemerlang dia akan buat jamuan besar-besaran untuk semua cikgu. Macam bernazar pulak. Wuhuu~

Dekat nak exam PMR tu aku kurangkan kenakalan aku dan struggle gile babem sebab aku dah janji ngan Abuya nak buktikan aku boleh. Nasib aku baik sebab aku dapat straight A kecuali subjek Bahasa Arab sebab ustazah tu garang. Haha memandai je. Ayah aku orang paling happy kot time tu. Mane tak nye. 3 tahun aku kat asrama, aku tak taw la berapa juta kali cikgu-cikgu kol mengadu pasal aku. Lepas tu ayah aku isi borang pertukaran aku ke sekolah lain. Abuya tak nak lepas aku, berulang kali dia pujuk ayah aku tak nak kasi aku pegi sekolah lain. Tapi ayah aku nekad, dia tak kasi dah aku stay jauh2. Dia nak aku sekolah kat area Kota Bharu, dekat sket dengan rumah aku.

Aku ingat aku dah free sebab lepas keluar dari penjara tu tapi rupa-rupanya hujan di tengah jalan. Mati-mati aku ingat ayah aku tukarkan aku ke sekolah harian biasa, so dah takde subjek B. Arab dah pasni. Rupanya aku kena masuk SMKA jugak, tapi girl school. No no boys anymore. Nak tak nak dengan berat hati aku pegi la jugak sekolah tu. Dah la kena dok hostel jugak. Alahai..

Lepas keluar sekolah lama seriously aku rindu gile sekolah tu. Dulu masa kat sana memberontak macam harem, bila dah keluar baru taw betapa bestnye kat situ. Sekolah baru best jugak, tapi tak sebest sekolah lama sebab takde aspura nak kena panjat. Haha. Yang paling takleh blah dulu aku rasa semua budak lelaki sekolah lama aku tak suka aku. Hari-hari kot dok kutuk aku. Tapi masa aku ngan Ajah nak pindah sekolah banyak la pulak dapat surat request nak jadi abg angkat kitorang. Perghhh perghhhh pergghhhh.

ni rakan-rakan sekolah baru

Siapa berjaya teka mane satu aku, dia bijak macam Farady. Eheh ;-)

clue : yang paling sopan. awwww

Sekian sahaja. Aku rasa penulisan entry kali ni agak skema, macam bukan aku. Mungkin kerana hormon untuk menjadi seorang guru semakin bertambah. Atau mungkin aku terkena sumpahan cikgu aku dulu supaya menjadi seorang skema. Wahaa~ Lantak pi la.

p/s: Zaman remaja adalah zaman paling memberontak dan paling banyak buat silap. That's normal. Tak semestinya remaja yang dulunya teruk akan selamanya menjadi teruk. People changed. Mungkin dulu kau yang paling nakal, paling dibenci tapi mungkin in future kau yang paling dihormati dan disayangi. Satu masa nanti kau akan tergelak sendiri bila teringat kisah silam kau. At least you have those memories which others don't have, as it's also means that you are the lucky one. Just be who you are =)
Hoyeah, hidup mesti skema bhai! ( tak pasal2 ) -_-

The Steps

2012-01-04T05:23:00.000-08:00

Last night I was walking on the road silently and alone. Suddenly out of nowhere, an old man appeared. He had a beautiful smile and he wore a white jubah. Then he came closed to me.

He didn't talk. He just stared into my big black eyes. He seemed like..someone that familiar to me, but I can't remember whom. He gave some signs, which means he wanted me to follow him. I can't remember what happened next, only that I followed him until we reached one of this place. Suddenly he disappeared. That place was so dark, I couldn't see anything and I felt so scared. My legs were cramped. I couldn't move at all.

I was almost cried. I called out everyone, my family, my friends. But no one there to help me. Suddenly someone appeared in my mind. I uttered his name slowly, with a last hope. (Sorry I can't tell the name here, it's kind of privacy as some of you might know who he is). Then I heard a voice, I didn't know what was it and where it came from. And I felt the wind blowing to my face, whispered something that I couldn't understand at all.

Then, I woke up.. dazed and confused.

Is that dream a nightmare or is it a sign? What's that means actually?

Perhaps I'm thinking too much. Hmmm...

Alternative Shoutbox of Shoutmix : Shout.Busuk.org

2012-01-03T06:17:00.000-08:00

Hello beloved readers. Without a further delay, let me introduce something new to you!
Yezza. It's a shoutbox which is so-called Shout.Busuk.org. (click to go to the page)

mine! ^_^

What's so special about this shoutbox?

1. Real-time chat
You don't have to refresh your shoutbox everytime you want to check out your new message. It'll automatically update! In other words, it's a real-time chat. Yeah, real time, not a dream time. Haha =P

2. Custom smilies
It has around 100 emoticons of smilies, special for you! In fact, you can use your own smiley, then you can choose whether you want to use it with the existing smilies or use it on its own.

3. Theme Customizable
You can customize the theme colour and choose your favourite colour to match with your webpage or blog. If you're gay, you better don't use the red colour. If you're straight, don't use the red colour. Haha. Kidding you!

4. BadWord Filter
If you don't like any harsh, bad or 'sensitive' words, you can filter those words and replace them with another words. It's as easy as a smile =)

5. Ban System
You can use the ban system to ban anyone from using or posting in your shoutbox. That's means you can stop those crazy maddy people outside there who keep disturbing you without a shame. You go babe!

6. Online user counter
It shows how many online users who use your shoutbox at that time. Isn't it so so great when you can see lots of people online and sharing within themselves? Whoaaaaa~ I can see your excited face! *wink*

7. Free of charge
It's free! Again, it's FREE! Again and again, it's FREE beb! You don't have to sell your used clothes or your old underwear just because you want to pay for something that you need! Just sign up and then you can start using it! Wuhuu~

How to use it?

1. Sign up here.
2. Customize the colour or the font as much as you want.
3. Copy the code.
4. Paste the code on your blog widget

So what are you waiting for?

Try it! Trust me you won't regret it and you'll like it thousand times more than others! Walaweh~

p/s: For any comments or problems, send your email to busuk.org@gmail.com

Happy using. Peace yo!

The drops from the black heart

2011-12-26T07:47:00.000-08:00

For moments in my entire life,
some people stand like mannequin,
with their words that seem to ring in my eardrums,
they stared daringly into my weak and solemn eyes,
as they were glistening as if a layer of wet plastic covered them.

Physically I seemed to be without pity or compassion,
but emotionally I drained of love
and hungered for it,
but my heart kept broken,
it felt like everything in it leaked out,
leaving it empty and hallow,
as the vacant spot somehow thruster forward,
unreasonable anger and rage.

I broke the tense silence,
I wanted to blurt out all my anguish,
inside I was falling apart,
but I still stayed composed,
stayed as cold as stone.
maybe it's not too late,
my heart spoke to myself,
the words pierced me in a way undesirable.

I slammed the door shut,
I ran to corner and cried my heart out,
I huddled in a ball like a baby,
for all tears wiped, I could have made a fortune.
I lifted my head,
I felt unbelievable heavy,
and the halls burrowing deeper into my hands,
it send painful sensations all over and over.

I peered out the window,
end lightened myself,
looking at the beautiful sky,
as stars scattered every where.

I took a deep breathe,
and listened to the sounds of the night,
words seems to be be too frail at this instance,
I closed my eyes, hugged the wind,
and the nightingale said to me,
everything would be fine after all.
they will...

Insha Allah.

- evagurl, Monday, 26th December 2011 , 3 a.m. -

Eternal Love

2011-12-10T07:50:00.001-08:00

Why are you so sad,
and why it is so bad,
when someone leaves you behind,
won't you ever know,
don't you realize,
it's just a part of life.
when you fall in love,
with someone sometime,
it's a smile with a broken heart.
only falling in love with Allah..
the hands of love survive,
no mountain too high when there's a will,
come to Allah you will never fail.
Insha Allah =)

Dear friends,
Sometimes we keep thinking and wondering why we still don't find the right one, why do the tears fall for someone who was never belong to us, why we always love someone we never had, why we can't be happy like others, why things are so hard for us, why why why and why... Just remember that God is compassionate towards all. So be trustworthy, turns our faces to Allah, Insha Allah we will find the sunshine everywhere..

p/s: Ya Allah... sinarkanlah nur hidayahMu ke dalam nuraniku.. Semoga jodohku adalah seorang insan yang menyintaiMu.. Tetapkanlah jiwa dan cinta kami padaMu, demi keagunganMu, di bawah naungan ArasyMu, pada hari tiada payungan selain dari payunganMu..

Early Marriage and Late Marriage

2011-12-06T11:40:00.000-08:00

It's already 2 a.m. I'm awake after ten minutes of sleep because of a dream. The dream of my beloved aunt...

Last year, my second aunt (a wife of my mom's brother) was being informed by the doctor that she had a breast cancer and it's in the final stage. So she had to stay in the hospital for the chemotherapy. Since her eldest daughter had a final exam and her husband had some important work to be settled, I was willing to help her and be with her at the hospital for two nights as my holiday was just started. Her condition was so bad. It became worst during the second night. She could not sleep, so she held my hands, looked through my eyes and said;

"Do you know..When I first met your uncle, I didn't like him and I really gave him a very bad impression. But then, things changed drastically. Later, we got married at the early twenty and we had kids. I ended up as a housewife to take care of my children. Being with my family, watching my children grow up, sharing their laughs and tears are the best moment I ever have. I'm gonna miss them so much.. Hurm.."

pic from Google

She stopped for a while. Then she continued; "Well, how about you? Do you any special one? Perhaps sooner or later, who knows right?"

I just keep silence. Then I said;

"Umm.. I will not get married until I reach the age of 26 and above. I want to collect a lot of money, further my study, perform umrah and hajj, buy my own dream car and a big house. After that I want to travel all over the world. I don't want to waste my youth by marrying any guy and end up with a feeling of regret because I do not enjoy my life to the fullest as I am supposed to."

She smiled and touched my hair. Then she said;

"I never dream to let go all I have in this way. I never expect to end up my life in the ward. No one want this to happen. But there's no way out, nothing I can do. Look, listen here my dear. It's normal for the youngster like you to enjoy your life, dream of the best things and grab all chances that come to you. But how long the time that you has? Will you be able to know that? I have lived a full life. I have the lovely siblings, went to school, met a good friends, have a responsible husband and beautiful children, experience my life like other woman. If I waited and got married late, I might never have it all."

She pulled me closer and hugged me. "You only have one life. Think about it dear, so that you will never regret it for the rest of your life."

That's the last words that I heard from her. She passed away a few days after, in her sleep, with a sincere smile and few drops of tears on her cheeks.

After she gone, I always think of my future. I start to change myself, my thought. Life is not as easy as we want it to be. A lot of things happen everyday. How can we be sure what will be happen tomorrow? Are we waiting until the day? We always waste our time by enjoying so much. What if the our time end up early and we lost it forever?

My aunt died young. Although she was not here anymore, she still have children who keep praying for her every day, like a rose in a garden. At least she always 'alive' in her children hearts until their last breathe.

I remember my ustaz had told me that if you lived for 80 years and you've been committing haram in your years, your life is totally nothing. But if you only lived for 20 years and you've been do 'amal' for those years, the door of Jannah is widely open for you. Isn't having a family is part of the 'amal' too?

"And in the end it's not the years in your life that count but life in your years." - Abraham Lincoln

It's a holiday

2011-11-23T21:05:00.000-08:00

Oh hello beloved followers and readers.

It's quite a long time that I've left this blog, not because I don't want to write anymore, but because of some reasons which are totally out of my control.

Last Monday I went to SBPI Gombak because my brother had an interview there. I met my IIUM lecturer, Dr Suhailah who was also accompanied her son for the interview. She said that there were almost 600+ of 5A's pupils all over the states who sent the application forms to enter that boarding school. However, only 67 pupils who were chosen for the interview including my brother and the school will choose only 34 of those 67 pupils. 67 out of 600+ and only 34 will be the luckiest to enter this school. Crazy enough right? Haha. Even year 6 pupils have to compete with each other to enter the best school, how about the IPT students? It must be harder. Btw, I just hope that the interviewers accept and give one of 34 opportunities to my brother. We all really pray for him. Insha Allah.

non stop raining

Now I'm in my hometown, Kelantan. It's very cold here, yet it's raining cats and dogs. Seems like some of the place in this state are already flooded. Luckily my house is in town area, so it's save from the flood. However, I can't go anywhere because some roads are closed and that heavy rain blinds me from driving out. Ahhh. I feel like Im in a prison, stuck and bored. Another bad thing is I can't watch Astro at all because the 'signal' or so-called decoder is being 'disturbed' due to the heavy rain, thus it's like we pay it for nothing. *sigh* Moreover, since I only have a broadband, the internet connection is so damned slow. Sometimes it can't connect at all. Perhaps this problem is also affected by the rain. Erkk.. So there's nothing that I can do for this one-month-holiday except sleeping, eating and watching movies from my external hard disk. Ouh sooooo unfair~

Almost 6 years

2011-11-15T05:52:00.000-08:00

I am in a relationship with studies and it's complicated.

pic from here

Just want to inform that I have finished my last paper this morning and it's a big relief! Fuh!
After almost six years of learning, now I'm looking towards the end.
I mean the end of degree, not phd yet =P
No more exam, only practical left.
April 2012, I'll be graduated!

Insya Allah~

There is no end to education. It is not that you read a book, pass an examination, and finish with education. The whole of life, from the moment you are born to the moment you die, is a process of learning. - Jiddu Krishnamurti

Exam Schedule

2011-11-05T04:37:00.000-07:00

09/11/11
EDC 4101
Teaching of Writing in Primary Schools
(9.00 – 11.30 am) (2 ½ hrs)
INVIGILATORS - RRM & IK

10/11/11
EDC 2218
Testing and Evaluation
(9.00 – 11.30 am) (2 ½ hrs)
INVIGILATORS - ANJ & BG

11/11/11
EDC 3501
Teaching of Local Studies
(9.00 – 11.30 am) (2 ½ hrs)
INVIGILATORS - RRM & CML

14/11/11
EDC 4213
Teaching Literature to Young Learners
(9.00– 11.30 am) (2 ½ hrs)
INVIGILATORS - BG & CML

15/11/11
EDC 4211
Teaching of Grammar in Primary Schools
(9.00 – 11.30 am) (2 ½ hrs)
INVIGILATORS - ANJ & IK

Sometimes

2011-11-05T04:31:00.000-07:00

things didn't work out successfully,
things happen in all of sudden,
things can't be fixed at all..

Strength..
Spirit..
Forgiveness..

Everything's gonna be okay..
Insha Allah..

What's wrong with you??

2011-10-19T20:01:00.000-07:00

Watch the video here

The fact is people nowadays are mutants, not human. Did you watch transformers? The Decepticons? Robots? Yeah. We are no difference from them. In terms of physical appearance, you can say that we did not look the same. But when it comes into emotional part, no difference at all. In other words, they don't have heart at all. I wonder where their humanities fall. Perhaps watching the child suffered on the road without any help is the normal daily case happens in their culture. Damn. Seriously damn.

Think. If that girl is your own daughter, sister, or family member, how would you feel? Oh. Can't you feel it?

If you watch this video without any feeling at all (whether it's sad, sorrow, upset, down and etc), then I'm bet that you're a part of them. Yes, a part of those Chinese people. Shame on you!

Those people should be the one who were struck by the drivers, not that girl.

Pity on her... :-(

*tears*

p/s: I pray that Malaysian still have the humanity.. in themselves..

My Roommate

2011-10-19T09:32:00.000-07:00

Did I tell you about my roommate?

Yes, I have a roommate.

Her name is Fina.

Fina is sweet and pretty,

Fina loves to sleep,

Fina likes cat,

She always call the cats in our hostel 'Sayang'

Fina likes quotes,

Everyday she read aloud lots of quotes to me.

She will open her laptop and says:

"Look, listen here"

Then she will read each quotes that she finds

My daily life is full with her reading quotes

The routine are after the class, during evening and before we sleep.

Everytime she reads them up,

I will say "Wait a minute, can you repeat?"

After that I'll post her quotes on my Facebook status,

with lots of likes from others.

One night,

while I was staying up to finish my works,

Fine woke up and said,

"I can't sleep at all'

Then she looked at her Blackberry

and read out loud the quotes for me until she slept

Haha.. So cute.

There is one quote that she likes the most. It sounds;

"If women do not exist, then all money in this world would have no meaning"

True indeed right?

There was one time,

when I felt upset and down because of certain people,

she smiled and said,

"The best way to make people remember you.. is to borrow money from them"

I laugh and laugh,

because she had turned my worry into a smile.

That's the best thing,

and the best part of Fina.

I love my roommate Fina,

I'll be missing our moments together,

Thanks for always making my day

and thanks for all quotes that we share,

Thanks for everything, Fina

:-)

Felt Keychain (Handmade)

2011-10-17T06:18:00.000-07:00

Currently I'm addicted to 'sewing and making hand craft!' Seriously bila dah start menjahit, confirm susah nak stop.Tak tahulah kenapa. Rasanya kalau study untuk final exam pun takde lah bersemangat bersungguh sangat macam menjahit. Lol. Memandangkan sekarang semua assignment dah submit, so masa free tu ada la sikit sebelum final exam awal bulan November ni. Haa nak tau tak ape kebende yang saya dok kusyuk jahit setiap masa? Taraaaaaa... ni dia:

T-SHIRT

front

back

T-shirt ni adalah percubaan pertama saya. Agak weird di situ. Masa tu saya cuba menggunakan benang biasa dan bukan benang embroidery. Embroidery thread lagi lawa!

NAME

specially made as birthday gift for my friend, Nadia ;-)

HANDBAG

Request dari Qeela untuk letak kat kunci kereta

LOVE

CUPCAKE

front

back

SOCK

front

back

Kalau korang nak tahu, 'keychain' ni dibuat dengan menggunakan kertas felt (felt paper), benang sulam (embroidery thread) dan kapas (cotton wool). Felt paper ni agak 'costy' sikit berbanding dengan kain atau kertas biasa sebab ianya agak tebal dan lembut. Lagi satu kertas felt ni boleh dibasuh (washable). So kalau kotor ke ape, boleh cuci dengan air, tak jadi masalah. Mudah kan?

percubaan menjahit buat pertama kali. huhu

Bendanya simple je. Tapi bukan main susah nak 'cut' dan jahit sebab keychain ni semua bersaiz kecil. Semakin kecil semakin susah nak potong dan nak jahit ikut rupa bentuk masing-masing. Kalau jahit mesin kejap je boleh siap. Tapi bila jahitan tangan ni agak amik masa la sket. Lenguh jari wa cakap lu. Haihh. Tapi minat punya pasal kan. Tak kisahlah kalau bersengkang mata pun asalkan hasilnya memuaskan hati saya sendiri. Hee ;-)

guitar ni belum siap dan belum diperkemaskan lagi, still in progress

Semalam masa tengah siapkan satu lagi keychain yang baru, roomate saya cakap:

"Ehs, ko buat semua ni nak kasi sape wes?"

"Takde kasi sape pun. Saje je buat. Seronok weyh. Ko patut try ah, confirm takleh stop. Haha."

"Why don't you try to sell it? Aku rasa ko bleh wat business kot ngan jual mende ni. Mesti laku punye. Budak-budak pompuan suka ah mende-mende manje camni."

Pergh. Semalaman dok berdiscuss dengan roomate pasal 'jual-jual' benda ni. Bila pikir balik, macam ada betul jugak cadangan roomate saya tu. Sambil-sambil berkongsi minat, why don't I try to sell them online kan? Apa pendapat korang?

Tadi ada jugak survey-survey kat blog yang jual gift. Tapi tak banyak pun yang jual felt keychain macam ni. Kira agak limited jugak, maybe sebab nak produce/making felt keychain ni a bit complicated kot sebab ianya dah kira macam handcraft, totally kena buat dengan tangan. Memang tak guna mesin punya. Diorang jual pun dalam rate harga RM 4.00 to RM 5.00. Harga pasaran. Korang rasa okay tak kalau saya jual dengan rate harga yang sama?

So sekarang saya nak wat survey dulu. Kalau ada sambutan, saya boleh start take order dari korang. Ni kira online selling. Korang boleh decide dan inform saya bentuk atau item ape yang korang nak. Contoh : Boleh refer pada gambar di atas. Nak handbag ke, cupcake ke, terserah. Kalau nak item yang takde dalam gambar kat atas pun boleh as long as I can make it. Jangan mintak yang susah-susah pulak macam robot Transformers ke. Naya ah, memang saya takleh buat tu. Lagi satu, korang boleh pilih combination warna (2-3 warna) mengikut citarasa korang. Kalau nak ada 'words' a.k.a perkataan macam nama korang atas items tu pun boleh. Nanti dah siap saya akan pos terus ke alamat korang. Simple and easy kan kan kan =)

Ehs lagi satu, kalau ada yang berminat nak order 'puppet' ni, sila inform saya jugak. Ni pun fully handmade tau. Untuk sesiapa yang bakal jadi guru ke, yang kerja kat taska ke, yang ada adik-adik or anak sedara, bolehlah guna puppet ni untuk 'mengajar' ataupun bercerita kat diorang. Seperti biasa, korang boleh bagitau pilihan warna yang korang suka dan order kat saya. Okay? *wink*

Sila tinggalkan pendapat, cadangan dan order korang di ruangan komen di bawah ataupun email to : fiona_girl88@yahoo.com.

p/s: Bulan Disember ni saya cuti semester, so kalau sesiapa nak tempah baju kurung biasa atau jahitan manik pada baju, boleh contact saya melalui email. No fon akan diberi melalui email. Kain atau baju kurung (untuk manik) boleh pos direct ke rumah saya terus. Bagi yang tinggal kat Kelantan, nak bagi hand by hand pun boleh. Tapi baju kurung biasa je yang saya amik upah, kalau baju kurung moden or baju kurung pahang, tunggu tahun depan la ye. Haha. Till then, take care people! Love.

My Wonderwall

2011-10-15T22:29:00.000-07:00

Sometimes it's not the song that makes you emotional, it's the people and things that come to your mind when you hear it.. - via book of quote.

Sense of my self expression

This song has been with me since I was sixteen. Yet it's already written in my heart =)

WONDERWALL - by OASIS

Today is gonna be the day that they're gonna throw it back to you
By now you shoulda, somehow, realized what you gotta do
I don't believe that anybody feels the way I do about you now

Back beat, the word is on the street that the fire in your heart is out
I'm sure you've heard it all before but you never really had a doubt
I don't believe that anybody feels the way I do about you now

And all the roads we have to walk are winding
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding
There are many things that I would like to say to you
But I don't know how

Because maybe
You're gonna be the one that saves me
And after all
You're my wonderwall

Today was gonna be the day but they'll never throw it back to you
By now you shoulda somehow realized what you're not to do
I don't believe that anybody feels the way I do about you now

And all the roads that lead you there were winding
And all the lights that light the way are blinding
There are many things that I would like to say to you
But I don't know how

I said maybe
You're gonna be the one that saves me
And after all
You're my wonderwall

p/s: Can you sing it to me? ;)

Pieces of Arts

2011-10-13T08:25:00.000-07:00

This semester I'm taking The Teaching of Arts and Visual as the minor course. Actually it's a compulsory minor course for B.Ed Tesl before ending our six years of learning. Well this course is for the purpose of training the teacher to teach arts and visual to the students. We have to prepare some lesson plans and materials for the students. Truthfully speaking I'm failed when it comes into drawing parts. I don't have the 'talent' at all. Pathetic enough. *sigh*

During the class, I've made some 'arts' to be sent to the lecturer as my portfolio. Although they were not perfect as others, but I felt a bit satisfied because I made them by my own! Wahaaa! Okay less talking, let the pictures talk and smile =P

Done with the course.. Fuhh..

Sick

2011-10-04T01:16:00.000-07:00

Today I get sick,
a fever comes to hit,
I want to eat a bubur nasik,
living in this place and feeling like shit,
to go home I must know the trick,
but I won't be able to make it fix,
and I just can play the rick.

-evagurl
-4th October 2011/4.30 p.m.

Happy Birthday To You

2011-10-02T09:09:00.000-07:00

Happy birthday little boy Hamzah Ian,

May God bless you in everything you do
May this birthday gives you a lot of sweet memories
Just believe that you area wonderful, unique person
Trust that you are a once-in-all-history event
Always learn to accept your own uniqueness
Always learn to set priorities and make decisions
Always learn to live with your limitations
Always learn to give yourself the respect that is due
It's your duty to be who you are
I pray that you'll be the most unique and happy human being
and you must always be able to stay one up on what used to get you down!

Sorry I'm not be able to prepare a great party for you, neither do I have a big birthday present for you, I only have the doa' that will always be with you.. Insha Allah. Amiinnnnn

p/s: You have grown up to be a 20+ year-old-man, but you are still a little innocent boy to me. HB adik :)

The Price of Appreciation

2011-09-29T11:00:00.000-07:00

I once was being asked,
why I left the past,
why I took the chance,
I just smile and glance,
because it's not the price,
but the love that arise.

The question of why,
could be answered because of a guy,
just an ordinary guy,
not a doctor or a contractor,
neither a model nor a billionaire,
has less compared to others,
as for the reasons of love,
with the sincerely acceptance,
my heart widely opened,
even he has nothing to be impressed,
for my own self he's the best.

A smile begins instead of sad,
a worry turns out to be glad,
no loneliness, no fear exist,
the feeling of knowing I have him,
besides me for every breathe,
with his shoulder that I need,
for the tears and the bleed,
I pray for a bless,
dream of everlast,
hope with no harsh.

When the wedding is in show,
I want him to know,
I'll hold his hand, bend in low,
saying that "Although you are leaving, I'll never let you go.."

-evagurl-
-30th September 2011
-2.15 a.m.

p/s: Im not a poet, I don't follow the poem rules, thus it's just my talking soul.

Officially I'm 23!

2011-09-22T01:05:00.000-07:00

22nd September 1988.

Today, 22nd September 2011. I'm officially 23 years old.

Happy birthday Izma =)

Truthfully speaking, I did not remember my birthday because last night we were so busy editing some lesson plan to be submitted before next week. Pathetic enough right?

Well who cares. I still got some surprises for my birthday! Walaweh~

So here they are! *wink* ;

As I came back from my friend's room, I got a sms;

Thanks for being the first one! Haha :-P

I also received other sms from Aya, Mas, Mcna and etc. Thank you so muchiesssss!

Oh my mom made my day by sending this:

Thank you mama! I love you more than love! You're the best mom I ever have! ♥

Hey guess what? I got 6 BAND T-SHIRTS from someone for my birthday present! Awww that's so awesome! Pretty cool enough! Yay!

After taking my morning bath, I rushed to take my food. When I tried to lock my room, I found that my keys are attached to something:

Omg!! It's very cute! Thank you so much Lin, only God knows how much I appreciate this! Im really thankful for your efforts and your time for making this cute love for me. Love you too!

Lastly, thanks for non-stop birthday wishes from my facebook friends. Really appreciate it. Thank you! ♥

Her biggest day

2011-09-14T09:51:00.000-07:00

The wedding of my closest cousin. It was on 9th September 2011. Since I was in Malacca and I was not be able to make it home, I only could see the pictures which were uploaded in the facebook. Pathetic enough huh. *tears*

Her wedding dress was made by Rizman Ruzaini. Her wedding official photographer was Muein Mahadi. Her beautiful cousin named Izma. Wahaha! =P

Since I only have their pictures (no pictures of mine..sob..sob..sob) , mind me sharing them with you.

SOLEMNIZATION

RECEPTION

OUTDOOR

p/s: Some of my friends thought that I was the bride because they said that our face look similar to each other. Are we? =P

Good morning teacher!

2011-09-06T08:20:00.000-07:00

Now we are going to learn Science in BM.

Hardware = barangkeras
Software = baranglembut
Joystick = batang gembira
Plug and Play = cucuk dan main
Port = lubang
Server = pelayan
Client = pelanggan

Okay beloved students. Now let's us try to translate this:

ENGLISH:
That server gives a plug and play service to the client using either hardware or software joystick. The joystick goes into the port of the client.

Now in BAHASA:
Pelayan itu memberi pelanggannya layanan cucuk dan main dengan menggunakan batang gembira jenis keras atau lembut. Batang gembira itu akan dimasukkan ke dalam lubang pelanggan.”

Excellent. Brilliant. Very Good.
::thumbs up::

...........................

Nowaday most of the Science references in the internet or book are written and publish in English language. I strongly agreed that Science and Mathematics should be teach in English, not in Malay language. How dangerous it will be if we try to use Bahasa, especially in school. You already see the proof above. What's the use of changing the policy if it is leading to the improvement? According to Datin Noor Azimah Abdul Rahim, education policies need to be well thought-out for the long term, and we cannot afford to have new policies with each new minister. Think about it people, your children future are in your hands.

p/s: For all teachers out there, do not use your mother tongue to teach English. Educate your students to get used with the language rather than translating the words to make them understand the lesson. As the old wise man said: ~

"Cuai seorang doktor hilang satu nyawa,

Cuai seorang pemimpin rosak sebuah organisasi,

Cuai seorang GURU musnah satu GENERASI."

*credit to HEadACHE for the 'lesson' above*

The Path of Life

2011-09-05T03:37:00.001-07:00

When I was a kid, I didn't have a laptop, iPod, Blackberry, PS3 or iPad.

But

I drew on the wall.

I read comics and books.

I played outside with friends.

I saved pocket money to buy these.

I picked up vegetables and fruits from the garden.

I played hide and seek.

I ate whatever my mom cooked for me.

Now, I use to hang out with friends but things are in the different ways. When we meet, we busy texting or sms others until we forget how much we miss each other. After we move to the chapter of android, bb and iphone, we tend to chat through them rather than meet up or spending time together. No more laugh, no more tears, only emoticons to resemble our feelings and thoughts.

How I miss my life before.

Life in the past was hard, but it was good and I survived. I appreciate the way I were raised. Thanks Allah.

p/s: Sometimes 'old school' is better..

pics credit to Google.

Eid 2011

2011-09-02T03:04:00.000-07:00

A day before raya. I sent my lappy to the computer centre to be formatted. In the evening, I got a call from the owner, telling me that I could take my lappy after office hour. So I went to the shop and brought it back home. After Isyak prayer, I opened it and I screamed out loud.

They formatted all data, both local disks including disk C and D.

I backup all my documents and data in local disk D (all important documents since I was in foundation until final year of degree).

But then I found out that nothing was left. I called the man who incharged and he told me that ; "I thought you already save in your external hard disk."

Yes, you thought that without informing me even a word.

My assignments, lesson plan, research data and critical essay which need to be submitted after raya, all GONE..

I celebrate my raya with tears.

Happy Eid Mubarak.

p/s: Dear friends, sorry for all mistakes that I've done, sorry for the harsh words, any fault or any actions which unintentionally or intentionally happened. Maaf zahir dan batin. Semoga Allah rahmati kalian.

Doaku

2011-08-17T00:58:00.000-07:00

Ya Rabbal Alamiiinn,
Dengan jemariku susun,
Aku memohon padamu,
Semoga bakal suamiku bukan dari kalangan fanatik KPoP,
Semoga adik-adikku tidak terpengaruh dan menjadi artis,
Semoga anak-anakku berada pada landasan dan syariat yang betul,
Semoga seluruh generasi muda Islam berpegang teguh pada prinsip hidup,
Semoga mereka semua diberikan hidayah,
Semoga pahala bulan puasaku tidak berkurang kerana tidak sengaja tertonton video ini,
Semoga pendengaranku tidak dikuasai oleh auto tune yang sangat berkualiti,
Semoga downloaded data broadbandku tak terjejas kerana video ini,
Semoga aku tidak ketawa berguling-guling lagi dengan gigi terkeluar apabila melihat hiburan kini,
Semoga semangat untuk menyiapkan assignmentku tidak berkurang selepas melihat tontonan free,

Semoga, semoga, semoga, semoga, semoga dan semoga.

Heart whispers to Soul

2011-08-14T03:09:00.000-07:00

There is the time when you find that life is quite difficult. Yet you have to use all of your physical and mental strengths to fight the non-stop challenges until you feel like you want to give up, leave everything and walk down the street alone without any memory.

I do feel the same way. Go to class, then go back to hostel, finish the assignment, group discussion, prepare for presentation, write the lesson plan - those are my daily routine. Well that's a normal life for student, no doubt.

Since this is Ramadhan, I suppose to double my ibadah but it seems like.. things do not happen in the way that I want it to be. Last week I showed my draft of the assignment regarding to the issues that happened in school. However, my lecturer did not approve my issues and asked me to change to another issues. I had to see her and showed my draft for many times until she approved. Actually the time given is not enough for us to do a lot of references and find the information because all assignments and research come at the same time. Yet we have to submit them in a short of time. So we don't have any choice at all. Thus I need to sacrifice my sleeping time and work double. Instead of waking up in the middle of the night to pray and ask for His forgiveness, I use the time given to complete those assignments (with non-stop working). After the iftar and Maghrib prayer I suppose to go for terawih but then I sit on the chair, open my laptop and continue writing the assignment until morning. Yeah that's crazy enough.

There was a night when I was busy typing the explanation for the issues and I fall asleep (with no intention). When I woke up, it was almost 7.45 a.m. and I didn't perform Subuh prayer yet! So I immediately take a wudhu and perform solah. That's sooo weird. Even the solat wajib you almost missed, how about the other ibadah? Durhh what kind of muslim are you? Come on Izma. It's Ramadhan! Again, it's Ramadhan. Where have you been?? =_=

Frankly speaking I feel a bit down.. I wish everything will end as soon as possible so that I can manage my time properly. I wish I could plan better, I wish everything is going to be okay. Oh how I wish those things. Forgive me God :'(

Till then, my take 5 has fulfilled by writing this entry. Now I have to offline and print the assignment to submit tomorrow morning.

Damned. What's wrong with me?

See that girl?

2011-08-11T07:57:00.000-07:00

Yeah, she's the one who stuck up for you,
the one who stayed up,
until midnight just to talk to you.
She's the one whose heart
flutters when she gets
a call or a text from you.
She's the one who fought for you,
the one that missed and loved you.

But by the time you realize
that she's the girl you want..

She's already be with
the guy who figured it out.

Hello beloved followers and readers. I'm quite busy since this is my final semester and I don't find enough time to update my blog. Well, I found this poem in tumblr. So I feel like sharing it with all of you. My advise is do appreciate the one that you really love before he/she leaves you without you realizing it. If you do love someone, tell him/her before you lose them. Don't afraid of being rejected because by telling him/her, your chances to be approved might be 50%. But if you hold and keep it to yourself, he/she might fall for someone and you will be the one who will suffer in silence.

p/s: Im the one who keep in silent until now. Pathetic right.. :'(

22.09.2012

2011-08-07T18:17:00.000-07:00

A hope.

I'll be waiting..

If you find me,

You'll get me.

If not,

I won't stay until the rest of my life.

I promise.

p/s: Do fight for me, that is the only thing I'm asking for.

Sastera itu Indah.

2011-08-07T08:59:00.000-07:00

Form 5 dulu masa belajar subjek Bahasa Inggeris bahagian literature mesti ada satu buku yang wajib kitorang khatam. Buku ni pelajar tingkatan 5 satu Malaysia wajib baca. Gua tak sure la sekarang budak form 5 guna lagi tak buku ni atau dah ganti buku baru. Tapi bagi mereka yang sezaman dengan gua confirm senasib kena hafal sinopsis, characters and bla-bla.

The Pearl by John Steinbeck. Pergh. Sampai sekarang gua ingat lu. Bagi mereka yang tak tahu buku The Pearl ni mengisahkan tentang Kino, seorang yang miskin terjumpa mutiara di mana mutiara tersebut mengubah keseluruhan hidup mereka. Satu kampung datang tengok mutiara tu dekat rumah Kino sampaikan penjual mutiara dan doktor pun tipu mereka sebab nak dapatkan mutiara tersebut. Okay nak dipendekkan cerita anak si Kino dan Juana iaitu Coyotito sakit tenat. Bila jumpa doktor, doktor tu bagi ubat yang salah sebab dia tamak nak cilok mutiara tu dari Kino. Akhirnya Coyotito menghadapi maut dan Kino mencampak mutiara itu ke dalam laut kerana terlalu kecewa di atas kehilangan anak kesayangan dan ketidak tenangan kehidupan yang dihadapi mereka selepas kehadiran mutiara itu di dalam hidup mereka. Oh maafkan gua ayat bm gua memang skema macam harem. (Pedehal lu nak sibuk).

Pada satu hari semasa pelajaran literature (kesusasteraan), teacher gua kasi satu soalan essay yang dijangka keluar dalam trial SPM nanti. Soalannya seperti berikut:

"If you are the writer of The Pearl, how would you want the ending be?"

Jadi gua dan rakan sekelas semua memang goreng habis ah. Jadah budget penulis hebat macam John Grisham. Padahal hampir semua budak kelas gua tulis ending dia Kino jual mutiara tu dengan harga tinggi, Coyotito dapat diselamatkan dan mereka hidup bahagia sampai bila-bila. Jenis perempuan semua benda nak happy ending. (Gua sekolah semua pompuan a.k.a girls school).

Keesokan harinya cikgu English gua baca essay sorang-sorang kat depan. Sampai essay yang last ditulis oleh seorang member baik gua.

After Coyotito had died, Kino and Juana sell the pearl at the town. After that they become rich and they get a new baby named Coyotiti. They live happily ever after with Coyotiti.

Coyotiti. Gua pun tak tau kenapa gua dan member lain gelak sampai bawah kerusi. Yang pasti gua memang ingat nama Coyotiti sampai sekarang.

Coyotiti. Pergh~

How to complete Quran in Ramadhan?

2011-08-02T08:25:00.000-07:00

The Qur’an has 600 pages approx. If you divide it on 30 days that’s 20 pages a day. If you think that difficult to do divide it into your 5 daily prayers and it’ll gets easier: Read 4 pages after every 'solat' in ramadan you’ve completed the Qur’an. If you want to complete the Qur’an twice you read 4 pages before and after every 'solat'. ♥

Selamat Berpuasa!

p/s: Sorry for being 'unavailable' for a while. Now I'm back! XOXO

Why did you write in English?

2011-07-27T04:30:00.000-07:00

Previously some people had asked me why I always post entries in English, why don't I use Malay instead of foreign language?

I have my own reason for that issue. To make it clear, let me explain a little bit to you.

Since I am a teacher-to-be, I need to improve more on my English language. Being an English teacher (soon) is not an easy thing to do. Yet it not as easy as teaching Bahasa Melaysia or Pendidikan Seni. There are some steps that we (teachers) need to follow as we learn and teach English which are :

Exposure - Practice - Use.

If I learn English but I do not practice and use it, for sure I will not be able to teach my students later as they get more exposure in learning through the television or internet. I will be..umm.. sort of out of date. Well I'm pretty sure that when dealing with human, we will never know what will be expected. So before I educate people, I have to educate myself (in informal way). It's quite a big 'amanah' and responsible for me.

Sometimes when we practice through writing, there's a lot of mistakes and improvement that we can find out. For example, usually when it comes into spoken language, you tend to say :

You are coming or not?
Faster faster faster!

Actually the sentences are totally WRONG! You should say :

You are coming, aren't you?
Come on, hurry up!

Do you get what I mean? Thus, what I want to emphasis here is when we talk, we rarely speak with the correct grammatical structure. However when we write, we always check whether the grammar is correct or vice versa. So if we keep practicing our English language by writing, we can speak English language with the correct way as it should be.

Alright. I think that's enough for tonight. Till then, good night people. Lots of love =)

p/s: Gua tak dak niat langsung nak berlagak ke hape taip entry omputeh. Setakat nak belajar and practice pun salah ke? Puiiii

Time

2011-07-25T10:33:00.000-07:00

There is a time when you feel like it's the time to be serious where you need to think, plan and pray seriously.

I am on that timeline.

I am supposed to...

p/s: My pain is released when I see the picture of my cousin (photoshoot).

More pictures in http://thejoezakaria.com/arda-hearts-syaiful. Credit to photographer Joe Zakaria.

p/s: Aren't she look so beautiful and gorgeous?

Yes. She is. I love you Kak Arda =)

Maybe

2011-07-22T11:22:00.000-07:00

Maybe part of love is learning to let go.

It's not that you don't suit me well or you're too good for me.

It's just...

Me.

The matter is I'm not ready for any relationship.

I... want to be alone.

I don't know until when..

I'm sorry...

Expertist

2011-07-20T04:46:00.000-07:00

One of our lecturers tells us that :

You will never be an expert of English language until you :

dream and speak English (while you are dreaming)
can talk on the stage or in front of thousands people spontaneously
speak fluently with the correct grammatical structures

Then all of us stare to each other and keep silence. Do we reach the title of the 'expert'?

Durrhhh. Maybe someday. Hahahaha XD

Oh another thing is we learn the art subject this afternoon whereby we have to draw anything that we can imagine at that time. This is our first class of drawing. So we don't expect much from the result. Actually I was born not to be talented in this field. I only know how to draw 'orang lidi'. Pergh. Pathetic, right?

There it goes my drawing. But before scrolling down, promise me that you won't laugh.

Don't laugh, okay?

Damn. I know you are laughing. Pfffttttttttttt

Sketch

2011-07-17T23:21:00.000-07:00

One for me, one for you. Eh did I just mention you? ;-)

the draft

I was being sketched by Rafe. For the first time someone did sketch the photo of mine and it's mouse sketch! Sob sob sob T.T *terharu*

the product!

Thank you so much Rafe. I really appreciate this! And I love it so so so muchhhhhhhh <3

Does heaven has a phone number?

2011-07-14T06:19:00.000-07:00

Hello Operator,

Can I have heaven's phone humber?
I need to call my friend, Hakim who was there,
I need him here today,
My heart hurts and I fell down; I need him right away,
Operator, can you tell me how to find his name in this book?

Is heaven in the yellow part? I don't know where to look.
I think my other friends need him too,
I hear them call his name sometimes,
I want to tell him Izuari, Izat, Nada, Hamzah, Ayeem miss him too.

Does heaven's numbers is here?
Because I need to speak to him,
I need to ask does he feels better?
Maybe if I call him, he will hurry to me.
I'm sure he'll be happy,
when I tell him I've become somebody,
as I promise to change to be what I should be,
and I'm not the old me.

Is Heaven very far away, is it across the sea?
He's been gone quite a time,
I really need to reach him, but I simply don't know how.

Help me find the number please, is it listed under "Heaven"?
I can't read these big, big words,
I'm sorry, operator, I didn't mean to make you cry,
Is your tummy hurting too, or is there something in your eye?

Oh you didn't have the numbers?

Thank you operator, I'll find it the other time...

:'(

p/s: The original poem was about sad poem for mom written by anonymous but I edited and changed a bit to produce this one. So no offence, thank you.

Kaca Hati

2011-07-12T22:10:00.000-07:00

" Dengan perangai awak semua macam ni, jangan harap awak nak lulus exam. Cikgu tak redha dengan apa yang awak buat. Bla bla bla.....".

Dialog cikgu sekolah aku beberapa tahun lalu. Peringatan yang memang aku ingat sampai sekarang jadahnya sebab aku langgar peraturan. Rules. Peraturan. Bukan semua orang suka ikut peraturan. Aku? Certain-certain aku ikut ah. Selebihnya kalau melampau sangat jangan harap aku nak ambil peduli. Kau?


pic from Google

Bila teringat zaman sekolah aku, aku mesti tak sangka yang aku sekarang berada di sini, di tempat yang akan bawa aku melangkah untuk kembali ke sekolah lagi. Bukan sebagai pelajar, tapi up sikit ah. Bagi aku, zaman persekolahan banyak ajar aku perkara yang tidak ada dalam syllabus. Kawan. Dunia. Keluarga. Realiti. Hakikat. Semua kau akan rasa sendiri pahit manis. Walaupun jatuh tersungkur, kau sendiri yang perlu bangkit kembali. Kalau nak kira dulu aku pun jenis kategori nakal. Kena rotan, kena panggil oleh guru disiplin, kena announce dalam assembly, dimalukan depan semua students, tu dah jadi perkara biasa dalam hidup aku. Jenis kaki bawak masalah. Bulan lepas aku praktikal dan aku dapat student sebijik perangai macam aku dulu. Pergh. Awal- awal dah dapat balasan. (-_-)

Mengikut pengalaman aku sepanjang praktikal tu, budak jenis nakal ni dah tak boleh nak lentur dengan kekerasan dan kegarangan. Rotan sampai mampuih pun tak dak kesan hape pun. Psychology should takes place. Sekarang semua nak kena pakai psychology. Kalau nak lempang terajang jawabnya esok kau masuk lokap kena saman dengan parents. Permulaannya kau memang kena boo balik kalau kau psycho diorang dengan cara baik dan lembut. Tetapi lama-lama kau akan nampak kesan positif, dan saat tu confirm kau dapat tidoq lena berdengkur ternganga dengan gembira.

Jadi aku nak ingatkan semua cikgu termasuk aku sendiri. Sebelum kau maki hamun anak murid kau sebab perangai buruk, kau kena maki hamun diri sendiri sebab tak pernah ambil tahu kehidupan students kau sendiri. Don't expect that you know them well if you only see them in your class twice a week. Jangan judge mereka dengan pandangan kasar kau di sekolah. They are totally different outside the school.

Lagi satu, ilmu ni berkatnya ada pada restu guru jugak. Kadang-kadang kau study sampai nak mampuih pun tapi kalau guru kau tak redha mungkin kau takkan dapat tahap yang kau sepatutnya capai. However, tak semestinya sebab kau cikgu, kau boleh suka hati kau nak tentukan yang mana students yang kau redha dan yang mana kau tak. Kalau kau berhati busuk, lebih baik kau tarik diri dari profession ni. Kau tak layak, jangan aniayai generasi baru yang tak bersalah. Pada pandangan kau, budak yang bermasalah itu adalah beban hidup yang menyemakkan setiap saat hidup kau. Tapi pernah tak kau fikir dia adalah anugerah Tuhan kepada kau untuk kau didik dan bukan untuk kau herdik?

Jangan anggap tanggungjawab kau sebagai rintangan dan bebanan. Jangan salahkan mereka selagi kau belum betul-betul mencurah bakti yang sepatutnya. Bersabar, lakukan apa yang sepatutnya dan bertindak professional. Awalnya memang perit, sampai tahap kau rasa kau dah surrender. But in the end you will find how worth it is. Trust me.

Bukan senang nak jadi cikgu. Bukan semua cikgu layak dipanggil cikgu sejati. Dan kau tak layak dipanggil cikgu kalau kerja kau hanya masuk kelas, pot pet pot pet dan keluar. Teaching is a work of heart. Setiap seorang pelajar kau ibarat permata, kalau kau jaga dan didik mereka dengan baik, insha allah sampai akhir nyawa kau ilmu kau curah takkan hilang. Insha Allah doa mereka yang akan bantu kau di alam sana. Ingatlah, jangan pandah rendah dan hina pada students kau. Try to imagine this. Satu masa nanti kau ditakdirkan menghidap penyakit kronik. Kau berada pada saat genting menunggu kedatangan doktor dalam operation room. Then kau kena bius dan tak sedarkan diri. Dengan izin Allah, operation tu berjaya dan kau selamat. Bila kau buka mata, orang pertama yang kau pandang ialah doktor yang operate kau.

Dan doktor tu adalah anak murid kau yang kau pernah maki hamun dulu.

...................

p/s: Kadang-kadang aku rasa mungkin ada hikmah aku tercampak dalam profession ni.

Aku dan Hostel #1 : Hikayat Malam Pertama

2011-07-10T09:23:00.000-07:00

2003. Batch aku (form 3) pecah rekod sebab paling ramai couple especially dengan budak form 5. Cikgu pun dah naik gila. Hari-hari asyik announcement panggil couple masuk bilik discipline. Biasalah smka, benda-benda macam ni memang dianggap salah. Nak dipendekkan cerita, ade sorang budak kelas aku ni yang kitorang panggil Jemiludin tiap-tiap hari dok sampaikan pesanan salam dari mamat form 5 yang aku sendiri tak kenal rupa. Katanye mamat tu ketua dorm die. Kononnye syok kat aku sampai tido malam, ngigau2 lagi tu. Hampeh. Yang aku tahu Jemiludin ni memang si tukang karut sedunia.

Then dari hari ke hari si Jemiludin ni tak putus-putus sampaikan pesanan dari mamat tu. At last si Jemiludin ni tunjuk jugak yg mane satu mamat tu kat aku time kitorg nak pegi lab. Yang tak tahannye lepas tu time makan kt dewan makan, si mamat cilakak a.k.a Brad Pitt celup tu selalu je makan mengadap aku. Time aku kat library pun meja kitorg bersebelahan. Dlm khemah rumah sukan pun dok sebelah-sebelah. Bukan aku yang perasaan lebih, tapi memang betul + nampak terang-terang kot, sampai member2 baik aku pun tegur. Tak tipu okay! Bila aku pandang dia, dia sengih-sengih.. Aku apelagi. Muntah berhingus berdarah semua keluar. Macam sial. Ceit.

Sebulan sebelum PMR. Aku dengan member aku plan nak panjat aspura (asrama lelaki) sebab nak pekenakan si kaki angau tu. Pukul 2.30 pagi lampu bilik study aspura padam. Check2 line semua dah tido. So kitorang merayap merangkak naik tangga aspura. Yang aku taw si Brad Pitt celup ni dorm 5 tingkat 2. So aku berbekalkan t-shirt, tracksuit n towel bersedia memulakan misi visi kami. Towel tu untuk tutup kepala – konon-kononnye nk menyamar jadi lelaki yg baru bangun nk pegi mandi kt toilet. Kalau aku pakai tudung dah sah-sah orang tahu aku ni pompuan! Sebelum tu aku pi rembat bedak Carry Junior satu botol besar kepunyaan classmate aku yg sedang tido terlentang kt dorm 6 (nama dirahsiakan). Lepas itu aku meneruskan mission 003 pedajalkan si Brad Pitt kesayangan itu.

Nak dipendekkan cerita lagi, habis satu muka dia termasuk badan kena mekap and gincu dek aku dan member aku. Si brad pitt tu pulak haram jadah tido tak sedar hape pun. Dah la tido berdengkur mengalahkan stadium bola. Ikut hati mau jek aku terajang sampai jatuh katil tapi bila terfikirkn misai warden aku Cikgu Juka ala-ala A.Galak tu terus aku cancel. Tengah kitorg syok menghias si badut sorang ni tiba2 ade bunyi benda jatuh. Kitorg pun apa lagi. Cabut lari cam nak mati. Sampai kat aspuri sedar-sedar key chain kertas bentuk love yang aku letak kt dalam poket seluar aku dah takde.

Esoknye kecoh satu aspura yang budak aspuri pecah masuk dorm diorang malam tadi. Stunt girls yang terlibat tu tak dapat dikenal pasti. Yang paling takleh blah si Brad Pitt pegi kecoh kat semua orang yang secret admire die panjat hostel sebab nak letak love letter punye key chain kat atas katil dia. Pegi mati. Yang pastinya sampai sekarang dia berhutang key chain tu dengan aku!

Spontaneous Thursday : Sexy Voice

2011-07-06T16:21:00.000-07:00

I wake up and try to call my mom when suddenly I realize that I've lost my voice. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

I am

2011-07-06T09:52:00.000-07:00

rude
unfriendly
out-of-date
not a good friend
bad tempered
talkative
stubborn
straight forward
stone heart
not sweet

If you want to ask about me, I would say that I'm all above. Thank you.

Sentimental Values

2011-07-05T10:59:00.000-07:00

My day was good until an 'amoi' broke my watch while replacing the battery. I felt like screaming because that was my only watch I ever have! I owned it since I was 17 which means 7 years already and now it was broken because of a careless girl who did not do her job well. Urgh. Luckily Im still a human and not a robot. If not I might change into transformer and don't you ever imagine what will I do.

I always stick to one thing at one time. I'm not the type of person who have a lots of 'things' such as watch or handphone and change them every time I go out. That's not me. For me, one is enough as long as it can be used. That watch, it might look a small thing to some people because it only costed for two hundred ++ ringgit but I bought it with my own money which I had saved for more than two months. Being a student and at the same time you had to save money and stop yourself from buying enough food was not an easy thing to do. Yet I was not the daughter of prime minister or rich people. I'm just an ordinary girl and my dad had taught me since I was a child that I should work for my own if I want to get something. So the value of the things that you got by own self was still there. It would never be the same with the new one.

the old one and the only :-(

See. The screw couldn't be used anymore. Sob sob sob T.T

As I'm the one who can't live without a watch, I buy a new one (the cheapest) which only cost RM10. It just for a short of time, I don't know how long it will 'stay' with me. At least it's better than not having any of it right? I need to save more money to buy the best one which will be lasting until my last breathe. Pheww~

the new one

Second thing, my handphone did not function anymore. I've been using it since 2006. At that time, I worked as a part time worker at A&W and I bought it with my 3 months salaries. Now it can't be used anymore. *sigh*

my hp - SE W660i (pic from Google)

Sometimes I dream that I marry the son of the dato' where I can buy anything that I want without thinking of the payment. But the real life is not as beautiful as you think. Wake up and work harder for your own sake. Oh life is so unfair.

p/s: Kahwin dengan orang kaya? Berangan je kau Izma. Puiiii.

Thanks for reading. Good night people.

Wardrobe Clearance

2011-07-03T08:05:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was my uncle's wedding. So we were quite busy the whole week, preparing for the meaningful day. A lot of things had to clear up including my cousins stuff as well as my own stuff. At last, we decided to do the 'wardrobe clearance' and sell those items. Do visit here :

http://sumptuous-sweetie.blogspot.com/

Thanks. Peace yo! :)

Heart

2011-07-02T12:05:00.000-07:00

pic from Google

Did you know that the jihad is not only in your action? It is also in your nafs and heart. There are 3 types of heart.

Sick Heart
Dead Heart
Healthy Heart

Healthy heart is the heart which full with good things own by the good muslims who always remember God and do things to increase their iman.

According to Imam Al-Ghasibi, the dead heart can't be alive again because annur (light) can't pass through the dead heart.

Knowledge is annur (light). When Allah gives you hidayah, that's mean He gives you light. When light can't pass through heart, theres no hidayah. Then it will become the dead heart. When you get into this situation, you can't go out.

However, the sick heart can be cure. When you committed wrong doing, do taubah and replace the 'dark spot' with good things. It is also known as purification of the heart (tazkiyatun nafs).

So which types of heart are you?

New Account

2011-06-27T08:31:00.000-07:00

Since I love photography so much, I don't think that I can live without seeing even a single picture everyday. I find out that I can see the awesome pictures from others as well as reblog them back through tumblr! Okay that's so fantastic as each photo has its own story. So I decide to create my own tumblr. Hey people, tumblr is amazing! If you have tumblr account, do share with me as well. This is mine:

http://evagurl.tumblr.com/

Feel free to follow and reblog! Love ya! Good night sweetheart ;-)

p/s: I'm still new, there's a lot of things that I should learn about tumblr. Teach me plz!

Why are you still single?

2011-06-26T11:13:00.000-07:00

pic from Google

When you are in a large community whereby all of them are almost at your age, you will find this type of question is being asked to you if you still do not involve with any relationship. I am in the same situation. Well I guess that's normal. Nowadays we do not really believe in family arrangement. Don't tell me that I'm wrong because I'm know I'm not. Haha.

The reason why I choose to be single is not because I'm too afraid of starting the new relationship or I'm too choosy. Neither do I hate guys nor I'm lesbian. My reason maybe not as same as yours. I don't care if people say that I'm a liberal thinker or I'm still living in a small box. Well who cares about others? As long as my own life does not have something to do with others, I will keep going with my own choice.

Okay, back to the main point. Let me tell you the reason of my current status (single).

When I was a child, I lived in Kuching, Sarawak because my parents were posted there. We had no choice unless we worked there for more than 5 years. So I was separated from my grandpa, grandma, cousins, aunties, uncles and etc. At the age of 6, we moved back to Kelantan. After UPSR, I entered a so called 'boarding school' until the age of 17. As I started to work at the clinic after SPM, I only spent a few weeks at home. Then i moved to the university life, and of course I was being so far from my family. To be honest, I was not really closed with my parents and my siblings because I rarely talked to them plus we were so busy until we did not have time to talk and laugh with each others. I spent half of my life, my teenagers time with my friends more than my family. Yet most of the time was being use to study, study, study, and study. In fact, when I had problems, I would share more with my bestfriends rather than my own family members.

pic form Google

Now, I'm 23. I start to realize that I only have a few time to be with my family. After I graduate next year, I don't have any idea where I will be posted. But I'm pretty sure that it will not be near to my hometown. So what I want to say here, before i move to the next chapter of life, this is the time that I should use to spend with my family, to know them in depth, get closed to them, talk, laugh and cry with them. Imagine that if I will get marry at the age of 25 to 26, I only have two years more to be with them! Only 2 years! Do you think that it's enough? You can say that after you get married, your family relationship will still remain. Yes, that might be true, but sometimes your new family can change the fact. Perhaps you have to follow your husband celebrating Hari Raya at his hometown although you have not seen your family for more than 10 months. Perhaps you have to move to Sarawak or Sabah and you can only back to your hometown once a year. Guys, a phone call will not be the same as standing and talk in front of them alive.Trust me, life after marriage will not be the same as life before marriage.

Hmm.. enough said. I don't care if people want to call me 'tak laku' or 'jual mahal' because for me, let me use those times that I have to be with them, my beloved family. For sure I will use it to the fullest. At least if I die before the age of 25, I know there will be people who always pray and recite the doa for me which are my own parents and my siblings. Thus, let me make myself available for them every seconds of their breathe. I want to hug my dad every time he comes home, I want to cook the best food for my mom, I want to read Al-Quran and pray together with my brothers and I want read the story book to my little cute sister before she sleeps. I don't have to worry about the relationship because I believe that God has send someone for me, what I have to do is only waiting for the right time to come. Insha Allah.

Baarakallahufikum fiiamaanillah, Allah Ya Kareem..

p/s: Actually I'm waiting for 'rombongan meminang' from Imam Muda Hassan. Pergh~ *perasan*

Wedding turn.

2011-06-24T01:28:00.000-07:00

pic from Google

Mama : Petang ni rumoh mak su timah pulok. Kito gi lepas asar la, baru tok jam sket.

Me : Sopmo keno gi bekwoh. Letih ah gini. Hari-hari makey nasik gulai, muko pun macey gulai doh2. Muok la. Tokse doh iza gi. Mama gi nga baba je la deh.

Mama : Eh budok ni. Jange dok wak payoh baso gitu la. Pasal dio doh mugo worih kito ramai. Maso ni la nok kenal worih waroh. Tebim dok wak payoh gitu sek sok time majlis kito tak dop ore nok mari baru tau.

Me: Takpo. Jimat sket pitih kito. Hahahaha

..............

Translation :

Mama : Petang ni kenduri kat rumah mak su timah pulak. Kita pergi after asar la, baru tak jam.

Me : Asyik kena pergi kenduri kahwin je. Letih la macam ni. Hari-hari makan nasi kenduri, muka pun dah macam nasi kenduri. Muak la. Tak mo dah Iza pergi. Mama pergi dengan baba je la.

Mama : Ehs budak ni. Jangan la degil macam ni. Biasa la tu, kan waris/keluarga kita ramai. Masa ni la nak kenal sanak saudara. Kalau degil macam ni nanti time majlis Iza tak de orang nak datang baru tau.

Me : Takpe. Jimat sikit duit kita. Hahahaha

p/s:Nanti turn kenduri aku, sapa tak datang siap ah.

Feedback to "uia-bakal-jadi-sarang-pelacur"

2011-06-21T20:54:00.000-07:00

Bismillah..
Menjawab kepada article ini.

Lebih kurang separuh pelajar UIA yang berlatarbelakangkan sekolah agama dan separuh lagi dari sekolah harian biasa. Itulah maklumat yang saya dapat, namun tidak mendapat kepastian yang sahih. Namun, semuanya kelihatan sama, bahkan tidak menampakkan sedikit pun ciri-ciri seorang pelajar yang mempunyai asas agama.

Ya anta, semuanya mungkin kelihatan sama kerana anta melihat dari segi luaran. Cuba anta lihat dari sudut perspective yang lain. Walaupun mereka dari sekolah harian, mereka belajar dan menimba ilmu agama di sini. Bagi mereka yang datang dari sekolah agama, mereka menambah dan memperluaskan ilmu agama mereka di sini. Perlukah ditunjuk dan diberitahu satu persatu ilmu agama yang mereka ada? Sejauh manakah anta mengenali mereka? Ana pernah berjalan pulang dari kelas waktu malam bersama sahabat ana. Semasa melalui masjid, ana terdengar bacaan al-quran yang sangat merdu, lafaznya mampu menitiskan air mata sesiapa yang mendengarnya. Pintu masjid itu sedang terbuka, bila ana berpaling, ana melihat lebih dari 2 kumpulan muslimin sedang mengalunkan surah-surah di dalam kitab suci itu. Bukan sekali dua, tapi rakan-rakan ana pun pernah mengalami situasi yang sama berulang kali. Siapakah mereka kalau bukan pelajar uia itu sendiri? Adakah mereka ini patut menampakkan ciri seorang pelajar yang mempunyai asas agama di khalayak ramai?

Pelajar UIA tidak seperti disangka. Aktiviti menghisap rokok dalam kalangan pelajar lelaki amat sedih, boleh dikatakan seluruh pelusuk UIA menjadi sarang lepak penagih rokok. Sedikit pun tidak tercampak rasa malu atau takut untuk melepaskan asap masing-masing. Kehidupan mereka bebas untuk berbuat apa sahaja. Saya sangat takut kelamaan ketagihan dadah pula menjadi aktiviti utama dalam UIA.

Setakat ni ana tak pernah lagi terserempak dengan golongan tersebut. Ana tidak tahu keadaan sebenar di mahallah lelaki, mungkin mereka 'smoking' berleluasa di dalam bilik. Tapi BUKAN seluruh pelusuk uia yang menjadi sarang lepak mereka. Do not judge if you don't have any prove at all.

Pelajar-pelajar perempuan pula seolah-olah lebih teruk berbanding minah-minah rempit. Mereka merupakan golongan terpelajar dan tahu hukum-hakam agama, namun dalam beratus-ratus berpakaian jubah dan tudung labuh masih beribu-ribu lagi yang memakai baju dan seluar ketat serta tidak bertudung. Memang benar! Pemakaian tudung di dalam kampus UIA sudah lagi tidak diutamakan. Pameran rambut boleh dilihat di mana-mana sahaja dalam UIA.

Minah rempit? Astaghfirullah... Ya anta, who are you to judge people? Walaupun ada pelajar yang masih tidak menutup aurat di luar sana, tapi di dalam kampus mereka tidak sama sekali melanggar peraturan. Tidak ada istilah pameran rambut di dalam uia itu sendiri. Anta ingat pelajar lain akan berdiam diri kalau lihat kawan mereka mempamerkan mahkota di depan orang ramai? Of course not! Lagi-lagi waktu kuliyyah. Anta jangan dikecoh benda yang tidak sahih. Malah lecturer sendiri akan mengambil tindakan jikalau hal sebegini berlaku.

Bebasnya UIA, pelajar-pelajar perempuan tidak malu lagi untuk berada di mahallah lelaki walaupun jam sudah menunjukkan pukul 12 tengah malam. Tidak percaya? Bolehlah selidiknya setiap malam di kafetaria Mahallah Ali atau tanya sendiri mak cik kafe. Jika perempun begitu, apa lagi lelaki.

Mengikut analisis, waktu tidur pelajar uia adalah kurang dari pelajar universiti lain. Ini lecturer ana sendiri yang bagi tahu. Mane taknya, university punye subjects pun dah berapa banyak setiap sem, tambah pulak dengan projek dan thesis yang nak kena siapkan. Anta mungkin lihat mereka di cafe pada lewat malam, tapi pernahkah anda selidik mengapa mereka di situ? Apakah yang mereka sedang buat? Anta memandang serong kepada mereka walhal mereka tengah group discussion atau bertungkus lumus menyiapkan kerja group yang perlu dihantar secepat mungkin. Kalau mereka mahu melakukan maksiat, buat apa mereka berjumpa di tempat khalayak ramai, kenapa tidak di tempat yang sunyi?

Mereka ini mungkin tidak sedar bahawa mereka masih belum berdakwah! Mereka hanya syok sendiri. Program-program mereka hanyalah untuk golongan malaikat. Sasaran mereka hanya untuk kaki-kaki masjid, ustazah-ustazah bertudung labuh dan golongan intelektual. Mereka sedang berdakwah tetapi hanya pada nama.

Ya anta, tahukah anta maksud sebenar itu dakwah? Pernahkah anta melihat kekerasan digunakan oleh Rasulullah s.a.w semasa baginda berdakwah? Pernahkan anda mengikuti dakwah-dakwah atau program yang dilakukan oleh 'mereka'? Jangan dituding jari jikalau anda tidak tahu sejauh manakah usaha dan keprihatinan mereka. Golongan malaikat? Setinggi mana pun iman kita takkan sama dengan golongan malaikat. Rata-rata di uia ini anda boleh lihat poster 'islamic event' seperti ceramah-ceramah dan usrah. Dan anta perlu tahu bahawa pelajar yang join event tersebut bukan semua yang bertudung labuh atau kaki masjid. Mereka semua adalah golongan biasa yang berjihad mencari ilmu untuk bekalan, wahai saudara. Jangan dikeji niat dan effort golongan pendakwah di uia. Sepatutnya anta sokong dan bantu mereka, bukan memandang sinis tanpa memikirkan perasaan mereka.

Ya anta, kita ni orang Islam, tidak layak untuk kita menjatuhkan kaum kita sendiri. Jikalau ada seratus orang yang berfikiran seperti anta, ana tidak tahu apa akan jadi pada uia. Sepatutnya anta bangga kerana diberi peluang oleh Allah untuk berada di universiti islamic, antara tempat yang boleh membantu anda mencari erti islam dan iman itu sendiri. Yang boleh mendorong anda melakukan kebaikan dan mencegah kemungkaran (amar makruf nahi munkar). Di mana lafaz syukur itu kalau anta asyik menyalahkan mereka dan berfikiran negatif? Di mana berkatnya ilmu itu sekiranya anda tidak ikhlas untuk berada di tempat itu? Semoga kita semua menjaga nama baik uia dan mengekalkan tradisi uia sampai bila-bila.

Baarakallahufikum fiiamaanillah, Allah Ya Kareem..

#Wordless Wednesday

2011-06-21T19:46:00.000-07:00

Satu Janji

2011-06-20T03:56:00.000-07:00

Hari Bapa. Aku sedang 'lunch' dengan ayah aku (baba) semasa mama call dan bagitau yang nenek masuk hospital. Dalam kereta:

Baba: Baba ni makin lama makin tua.. Dah tak larat dah.. Tunggu masa je. Iza dan adik-adik pun dah besar, dah boleh hidup, buat keputusan sendiri. Dah jumpa yang berkenan?

Aku: Hurm.. belum.. tak nak ah fikir pasal tu, takkan nak tinggal baba. Iza nak dok ngan baba.

Baba: Ish budak ni.. Satu masa nanti kena ada family sendiri jugak. Takkan nak berseorangan sampai ke tua. Tak elok kahwin lewat sangat, Iza tu pompuan. Tak manis orang pandang nanti.

Aku: Ye la ye la.

Baba: Kita ni orang ada ilmu.. ada pelajaran.. ada agama.. Nak cari teman hidup ni bukan boleh main-main, bukan boleh amik tepi jalan je.. Pilih orang yang cukup ilmu agama, tahu hukum hakam, tahu bacaan quran, yang boleh jd imam, baru tenang hidup. Nak harapkan duit dan rupa je mana cukup.

Aku : Tapi sekarang susah ah nak cari lelaki macam tu. Macam tak dak je. Dalam mimpi je kot.

Baba: Iza.. Iza.. Walau tinggi mana pun ilmu kita, walau kuat mana pun iman kita, walau cantik mana pun rupa kita, satu masa mesti kita akan buat silap jugak..Walau teruk mana pun salah kita, pintu taubat tu sentiasa terbuka asalkan kita ikhlas dan betul-betul nak bertaubat. Nak dapatkan yang terbaik, kita sendiri kena jadi yang terbaik.. Masa silam tu tinggal ke belakang, untuk masa depan kita yang kena bersedia dan ubah diri kita jadi lebih elok. Allah itu adil. Rajin-rajinlah berdoa dan sembahyang sunat, insha allah jumpa la tu yang macam kita nak...

Aku: Umm.. (sigh)

Baba: Lagipun baba dah tua. Dah tak larat nak marah-marah, Iza pun dah besar, dah tau mane baik buruk. Selagi Iza belum kahwin, selagi tu la Iza dalam jagaan baba. Sekali Iza buat dosa, baba pun kena tanggung sama, sebab Iza tanggungjawab baba. Iza nak ke tengok baba kena seksa nanti sebab perbuatan Iza? Iza nak ke baba dapat balasan sebab Iza langgar hukum? Apa baba nak jawab kalau kena soal 'di mana kamu semasa anak kamu buat itu, ini? Apa peranan kamu sebagai ayah?' Iza sanggup ke? Iza tak kasihan kat baba? Iza tak sayang baba?

Menitis air mata.

Aku... takkan kembali ke jalan itu lagi...

p/s: Once I go, I'll never turn back...!

Do not marry if you did not ready yet

2011-06-17T11:28:00.000-07:00

I was walking down the road when I heard a sound of shouting. I turned to look what was going on. Then I saw a woman was mad at her husband and said something bad to him. Her husband was trying to hold her hand and said 'Im sorry, I love you.." But she ignored and pretended like nothing was happened.

Hey beautiful lady. If you still did not realize who was in front of you, let me remind you. He's your husband, your loyal husband! Who are you to rise up your voice? Don't you know how worst it is if you did not respect him? You can't find a good people in a cheap store. Do appreciate of what you have, if not you will regret it for the rest of your life.

Semoga kelak aku bukan seperti itu.....

Geng Blogger and Government Websites kena hack!!

2011-06-15T21:49:00.000-07:00

Selamat pagi. Web ping terkenal Malaysia, gengblogger.com baru sahaja digodam pagi tadi oleh seseorang yang menggelarkan dirinya adam oscar dimarco. Sehingga entri ini ditulis, pada pukul 6.46 pagi, web tersebut masih belum dibaik pulih oleh Admin GB sendiri. Berikut adalah screenshot yang sempat diambil oleh saya:

Beberapa orang mendakwa penggodam hanya melakukan defacement pada hompage http://gengblogger.com/index.php , tidak melibatkan keseluruhan web.

Antara mesej yang ditinggalkan adalah:

dont focus on popular blogger only. promote them too listblog
Im not anonymous. Im adam oscar dimarco
I’ve been here before. Remember Me?

Penafian kaitan dengan Anonymous

Seperti yang semua orang maklum, pada tengah pagi tadi, #OpMalaysia turut dilakukan oleh Anonymous Hacker. Walaubagaimanapun, penggodam yang menggodam (hack) web gengblogger menafikan beliau terlibat dengan geng Anonymous, sebaliknya mendakwa beliau pernah menggodam gengblogger suatu ketika dahulu. Ya, GB pernah beberapa kali digodam dan diserang malware sebelum ini. Walaubagimanapun, cara penyerang menggodam web tersebut masih tidak diketahui.
Diharapkan admin GB, Kong (atau admin lain-lainnya) dapat mengambil serius hal ini kerana gengblogger merupakan satu web ping yang sudah dikenali ramai. Mungkin kes-kes seperti ini sedikit sebanyak akan mencalarkan imej gengblogger itu sendiri.

Senarai web yang diserang dalam #OperationMalaysia

Dah alang-alang tulis pasal geng Anonymous, berikut adalah antara web yang diserang. Ada di antaranya yang di hack, dan ada yang di DDOS. Kebanyakannya adalah laman web milik kerajaan, dan serangan dilakukan atas tindakan SKMM menyekat pengguna internet dari melayarti 10 laman web muat turun. Sumber world.yes.my:

SabahTourism.com – Hacked + leaked
Tour Malaysia (Not Tourism Malaysia) – Hacked
Tourism Malaysia – Unaffected
UiTM Penang – Hacked
JBiotech - Hacked
Social Welfare Department (Ezi2Care) – Hacked
CIDB – Hacked but back up 12:20am
Land Public Transport Commision – Hacked but back up 12:15am
1Malaysia – DoS / Switched off 3:45am
Malaysian Communications and Multimedia Commission - Unaffected
ASEANConnect – DoS / Switched off
Malaysian Meteorological Service – DoS / Switched off
Ministry of Education – DoS / Switched off
Suruhanjaya Pilihanraya Malaysia – DoS / Switched off
Bomba - DoS / Switched off
TMNet - Unaffected
Perbendaharaan Malaysia - DoS / Switched off
Kementerian Kerja Raya Malaysia - DoS / Switched off
Parlimen Malaysia – DoS / Switched off
Malaysian Treasury – DoS / Switched off
University Kebangsaan Malaysia – DoS / Switched off

Jobs Malaysia – DoS / Switched off

Information, Communications and Culture – DoS / Switched off
Human Resouce Ministry – DoS / Switched off 3:59am
National Sports Council – DoS / Switched off
Polis Diraja Malaysia (PDRM) – DoS / Switched off

Info credit to beloved grand child Affan. Haha =P

Teaching Experience #1

2011-06-10T06:29:00.000-07:00

Me : Okay class, now take out your facebook and turn to page 60.
Pupils: Haa? Text book la teacher, bukan face book.

......................

A door to Exit.

2011-06-06T21:35:00.000-07:00

Warning - This is an emotional post. Please do not read if you have a migrain or heart problem. I will not be responsible if you want to take this risk. Thank you.

Dear blog,

I've been thinking a lots before I write this entry. My life is changing. Totally change.

pic from Google

Every girl wants to be a beauty. Every girls loves beauty things. Same goes to me. I always want to look good in everything that I do, everything that I wear and everywhere that I go. I want people to see me with words of "Wow, she's gorgeous!" or "Wow, she's beautiful!". Since that, I try to grab every single opportunity that comes into my life. As I love photography, I take a first step to be a talent. I love being the subjects for each photo that had been taken. Then I start to adore this field so much. I move from title of the talent to become the one who walk on the stage for several awesome fashion shows where people stare at me with an amazing looks and keep asking me 'Can I get your numbers please?". Oh I love to be a part of the stories behind the show and the photo shoot as well. It is such a great memories which I will never forget until my last breathe.

However, everything starts to change last two days. It was a dream. The same dream which was repeated for more than two times and it was not a good dream. It was a dream that totally harm my life. I remembered that I once asked my ustaz about the dream during the lecture last semester. Ustaz, should we believe in dream? How can we know if the dream is true or vice versa? How should we know that the dream is a message from God or a lie from As-syayatiin? My ustaz had mentioned that sometimes if you dream of something bad happens in your life and the dream is repeated for many times, it means something. The dream might have two conditions. First, that bad thing will really happen to you. Second, that bad thing will not happen but you get the dream because it is a sign from Allah. He wants you to change, he gives you hidayah through the dream. He opens your eyes and your heart through your dream so that you can see the truth. It is also a test for your 'Iman', how far it is, how strong it is.

I don't now which condition that the dream belongs to. The first or the second one? I..don't know what to do. I feel lost. Empty. Down. Everything comes up in a same time but not in a right moment. I couldn't carry it anymore. At last, I call a friend and ask for his opinion. Since he is older than me, I think I can get some advices regarding to the problem. Although he is not handsome, has a big nose and the big eyes like owl, he did tell me something that I never thought before.

Me: Bla bla bla bla bla bla.. So, what do you think?

He: Hmm.. To be honest, let me tell you something. Imagine when you get married. Then you leave all this things. You promise that you will stop joining this modelling field. You marry to one man, only one man, but don't you know that a lot of photographers (men) still keep all of your photos? They are men! Then what will you say when some day one of your grandchildren comes home and tells you that his friend brings your photos to school and show to other friends where his friend says that he gets it from the album of his grandfather which is a famous photographer a long time before. What will you say to him? How will you explain that? Will you say that " Oh, granny was a model. " Would you be able to tell that?

No, I will not be able to tell that! I don't want neither my children nor my grandchildren to follow my step. Frankly speaking, usually it's very hard for me to listen to any advice although it is a good one because I am a stubborn girl. It is not easy for me to change. But I do listen and follow his advice well. Maybe because I feel like he's my own brother even though we come from different types of blood. The most important things here is probably God has opened my heart and guide me to follow what I think the best for me. He knows the best, so I pray for the best.

There is only one way. If I don't want something bad happens to me like the one in the dream, I must leave this modelling field. I have to quit. Or else I will find myself crying alone in the middle of the night at the back of the bed with the feeling of regret until the end of my life. Stepping away from this world will be one of the most difficult time for me. I know I'm not an artist, I'm not the one who always come up in famous magazines or television show. I'm only a small butterfly which only known by a few photographers. But I feel hurt. When you leave something that is the reason for you to be almost on the top where people know and adore you because of your performance, I tell you it is really not an easy thing to do! Trust me. It is so hard until I feel like I want to run away, hiding myself from anything and hoping for the Judgement Day to come. But I have no choice. This is the only decision I should take, and it is the best one for this moment.

Oh God..I don't want to be famous. I don't want to be the idol for other girls because of my style or my pose. I want to be the best woman, the best daughter, the true muslimah, the best wife and the best mom.. I don't care if I'm not special like the others. I don't care if people say that I'm a typical Malay or telling me that I'm stupid because of the decision that I've made. But I do care of my life in the hereafter! What should I say when He asks me what have I done in this world since I was born until my last breathe?

Dear people, don't hate me for what I've written. My life will never be the same as yours. We are all given the chance and it is we, ourselves who will decide which road we want to take. For the first time in my life I realise.. All day long I had no time, to spread a word of cheer, no time to speak of Allah to friends, no time to give to souls in need, no time, no time. Too much to do, that was my constant cry. How if tonight is my last time, the time to die. Then I go before the Lord, I come, I stand with downcast eyes, for in His hands God held a book. It is the book of life. God look into His book and says, your name I cannot find. I once was going to write it down, but never found the time... :'(

I.. want to write it down..sincerely.. I want a second chance.....!

For my future husband, I don't know who you are, how do you look like, how Islamic are you, but I just want you to know. I'm not a good person in the past and I'm in the process of inhealing myself. I made a lot of mistakes. I have hurt so many peoples. I've being an annoying girl for a long time. When the time comes, I want you to know that Im really sorry for everything. Give me a chance to be myself, the real me. I pray that you are a someone who knows how to read Al-fatihah in a correct way, who knows 'hukum tajwid', who can be an Imam in all my solah, who do the pillars of Islam, who is willing to share whole of his life with me, who will love me until your last breathe. I know I may not be the best girl in the world, but I promise that I will be a good muslimah, wife and mom. Insha Allah..

p/s: Allah, You are my Lord, there's no God but you. You have created me and I am Your slave and I'm bound to Your convenient and Your promise to the best of my ability. I seek refugee in You from the evil of what I've done. I beg your grace on me and I confess to You my sins. So forgive me, for none is there to forgive sins but You...

Would you?

2011-06-06T05:31:00.000-07:00

Would you please stop writing to me?
Because your letters ain't nice
They are blinding both of my eyes

Would you please stop singing to me?
Because your verse and chorus curse
They are deafening both of my ears

Would you please stop hugging me?
Because your arms are tones-heavy
They are squeezing my lil body

Are you blind, deaf, or senseless?
Is something wrong with your nerves?

Or with me you fall in love?

Would you please stop staring at me?
Because I can see your tears swell
They make me wanna cry as well

Would you please stop loving me?
A man dying with cancer.

-Anonymous

I found this poem somewhere.

p/s: What do you think after you read it?

Jatuh

2011-06-05T07:23:00.000-07:00

Aku....
sedang jatuh..
Bukan niat aku mahu menyepi.
Berikan aku sedikit masa.

Teringat kat arwah hakim.. Dulu selalu mengadu kat dia.. Skrg.... :'(

I bid you welcome to my world

2011-06-05T00:50:00.000-07:00

One thing about me. When I feel like I'm not okay, I tend to be away from the world. I will keep quiet, I will not talk to anyone and I prefer to be alone without caring what's going around. Then I will turn on my MP4 or my lappy, take my headphones and play the songs loudly. That's my habit. I know, it's bad.

There was one night when I search some instrumental songs in Youtube. Then I found videos of one guy, a pianist who played the piano through his heart. That was on May 2008. Yes, I still remember that day. The first video that I watched was this one. Since that, I always download most of his videos. Emm I'm not so good in playing musical instruments. I always being jealous with those musicians because they can express their feelings through their musics while I realize that I will not be able to do as same as them. They are so lucky, isn't it?

May 2011. It was an awful day. Something had came up and I was not be able to handle it at that moment. Then I locked myself in my bedroom, searched for my old folders of songs. Then I found the video collections of him (those which I downloaded and kept). I wonder why I always being a silent fan, why don't I try to be friend with him? I guess maybe this guy was a good person.

Then I found his facebook and we became friends. Yes, he's very nice!

Oh why did I said so??

It is because he made one video for me! Special for me! Sincerely speaking, 23 years I breathe and there's no one who dedicate or play a song for me until that day. Seriously, I feel touched and almost cry. Haha. Thank you so much Incik Kazak, thanks for this video. Although I always 'bully' you, but I really appreciate what you did. Again, thanks a lot. Can I request another song plz? Lol =P

Here it goes one of my favourite songs. Guys, you should watch this video!

Lots of love, thank you! =)

Tips of choosing high heels

2011-06-04T02:30:00.000-07:00

Women always want to look good in everything. That's normal because we were born with our own 'nature' - fame. I'm pretty sure that many women love high heels. In fact, they feel that they gain more confident when they wear high heels. However, they don't wear them very often. Some high heels are the good killers as they can cause the bad foot pain as well as affecting your back bone.

Well I admit that I'm also wearing high heels every time I go to some events, fashion show or photo shoot. If it's not a formal occasion, I would prefer sneakers or flat shoes where I can move faster and jump anytime I want. Lol.

Okay now let move your heels phobia out! Walking in high heels is not so difficult, you only need some practice. Fyi, there are some types of high heels which can make you feel comfortable even though they are 6 inch'! First, you have to choose suitable high heels for the occasions/events.Let's say if it is for :

1. Hanging out

Don't choose a kind of stiletto like this

or this

It might look good and can 'push' your humps up but at the end you will find yourself in a hospital, counting days of operation. It's better if you choose 'wedges' or 'platform'. Some said that wedges are not consider as high heels and some said that they are. Oh who cares? As long as it increases you height, it should be considered as high heels right? Haha. Pardon me for that typical thinking. *wink* Okay back to the topic, if you are ready to go out, those wedges/shoes below can make everyone stare at you with an impress look.

omg! this one is so stunning! love it

looks delicious

simple and nice

smart

red-licious and comfort

elegance

nice and cool

One more things, a 2-inch heels cause less problem than 4-inch heels. So you better think twice if you really want to wear the 5 to 7 inch heels. If it will take more than five hours of going out, you should take less inch.

2. Photo shoot

Usually I always choose heels which have 'contra' colours with my outfits. I did not choose the same colour of dress and heels because those colours play important roles in shooting. For example, if you are wearing black jeans, you should step in white heels. So when people see the photo, those colours will make the photo look 'alive' and trust me it will be an awesome photo! (unless if you don't shoot from right angle, don't blame me for that. haha) Let me show you the prove :

white heels look stunning with black jeans

you can still see the heels eventhough it's cover by that tree!

white-black-blue-yellow

this model is wearing grey socks and light brown heels. gorgeous!

3. Fashion show

When it comes into fashion show, you cannot wear flat shoes. Based on my own experience, we(models) had to wear heels that are very very high (not less than 6 inch!). The professional models can walk on the stage in a proper way no matter what kind of heels they are stepping in. That's impressed! Since I am so thin, I can't wear stiletto heels or else I will fall on the stage like a 'nangka busuk'. Pergh. I can't imagine that. Pheww~

In doing so, I always choose the 'thick' heels for catwalk. As example, in the picture below is one of the heels that I always used for catwalk.

Don't look at me, look at the heels that I'm wearing.

I tell you, it's really stable and comfort! I can walk, move around without any worry even though the dress or outfit that were provided for the fashion show cover my feet.Another example of heels that I found suitable for fashion shows are:

With those heels, you can walk with pride instead of walk with pain! Then you don't have to see the health professional anymore. Does it sounds good? *smile*

Oh before I forget, there is one thing you should take note. Foot cushions are essential! As you walk in heels, you will naturally put the your weight and body on the front or the ball of your foot. So you should have foot pads in your high heels to add cushion and support.

food pads

That's all that I know. Frankly speaking I just want to share, I'm not a professional at all. I am only speaking from my experience. Different people different views and opinions. So please proceed with caution and attempt at your own risk. Thanks for reading. If there's anything you want to ask, you can write in the comment box below. Thank you. Have a nice day beautiful ladies! ;-)

Surat Untuk Sahabat

2011-06-02T21:40:00.000-07:00

Aku tak pandai bermadah pujangga. Aku tak pandai bercakap lembut. Aku tak pandai hantar msg cute-cute. Aku tak pandai nyanyi lagu atau tulis puisi syahdu untuk kau. Aku tak pandai melukis. Aku tak reti nak vlog. Aku cuma tahu menulis dan menaip, walaupun Bahasa Melayu aku tunggang langgang.

Sepanjang persahabatan kita, Aku selalu:

psycho ko tahap dewa.
marah dan gaduh dengan ko tak kira masa tempat dan keadaan.
berebut milo tabur dengan ko.
paksa ko makan banyak-banyak walaupun ko asyik cakap ko makin gemok
kutuk kening ko macam The Rock hero smack down. (betul hape)
menjerit sampai nak pekak telinga bila ko tak nak panggil aku kakak dan cakap aku macam budak walhal aku lagi tua dari ko.
bercakap dan gelak kuat-kuat bila dengan ko walaupun semua orang pandang dengan muka-apa-hal-budak-ni.
membebel sampai kering air liur kasi nasihat macam nenek kebayan tapi ko buat derk jek.
buli ko tapi ko turut je macam budak nerd.
buat lawak bodoh macam harem walhal ko tengah mengadu masalah.
paksa ko ikut aku pegi mane-mane walaupun time tu kita sama-sama ada money problem.
ugut ko suh teman aku karaoke berjam-jam walhal suara ko macam bruno mars dan suara aku macam toad.

Dan ko selalu:

buat muka seposen bila kena marah
cakap aku huduh walaupun aku cun. (perasan)
mengalah dan lembut hati walhal aku keras kepala dan degil gile babem.
kasi tips bodoh cara nak tackle lelaki. Sumpah satu pun tak menjadik. Haha
berlagak macam JPJ kalau aku yang drive walhal aku lagi terror drift dari ko
back up aku kalau aku jatuh cinta dengan org yang salah
dengar je aku cerita pape walaupun ko tengah busy
sokong aku walaupun kadang-kadang aku yang salah
makan nasi goreng belacan dan cilok kailan ikan masin aku. lol
kutuk gigi aku jongang
ketawakan aku bila ade orang cakap muka aku macam bini no 4 Salleh Yaakob
panggil aku andartu banyak mulut
cakap aku orang kampung sebab tak reti pakai Blackberry (mmg tak reti pun)
ikut aku ke hulu ke hilir pegi photoshoot dengan barang-barang bersepah kiri kanan ko kena bawak.
apa-apa hal mesti cakap 'mung kan model'. sumpah rasa macam nak terajang jek
habaq muka aku pucat macam mayat kalau tak pakai make up. grrrr
respect dan tak pernah smoking depan aku
lebihkan kawan daripada makwe ko sendiri. adei..
mintak maaf lebih-lebih padahal bukan salah ko pun

Mungkin aku ini adalah beban dalam hidup ko. Adanya aku membuat keadaan menjadi lebih teruk. Tetapi aku mahu ko tahu yang aku :

tak boleh tengok ko sedih.
tak boleh tengok orang lain buli or cari pasal dengan ko.
tak sanggup biarkan ko pegi makan durian sorang-sorang walaupun durian kat KL mahal nak mati
tak senang duduk kalau ko kebuluq tak makan walaupun ko asyik bagitau ko diet.
agak kecewa sebab tak mampu buat apa-apa walaupun tahu ko dalam masalah
selalu fikir macam mana la ko kat uia tanpa aku. Makan ke tak? sihat ke tak? ok ke tak?
sanggup ponteng kelas sebab nak temankan ko tengok movie. (takleh blah)
tak sanggup nak tinggal ko sorang-sorang dan dok jauh dengan ko. sob sob sob.. T.T

Sekarang ko tengah down dan aku tak mampu untuk buat apa-apa. Maafkan aku.. Bagi aku sedikit masa, akan aku tebus balik sesalan yang pernah aku rasa. Aku menyusun sepuluh jari menutup muka untuk mengucapkan:

Terima kasih sebab tolong hantar motor aku pegi workshop walhal time tu kita semua tengah final exam. Dahla panas terik, tapi ko sanggup tolong aku tanpa fikir penat susah lelah.
Terima kasih sebab selalu tersenyum dan ketawa walaupun kena marah.
Terima kasih sebab sanggup nak datang amik aku kat airport walaupun ticket aku kena burn.
Terima kasih sebab ada bersama aku masa aku down time arwah hakim pergi..
Terima kasih kerana menjadi sebahagian dari hidup aku walaupun aku banyak susahkan ko.
Terima kasih kerana tak jemu bagi sokongan walaupun aku tak layak untuk itu.
Terima kasih kerana buat aku rasa tidak kekok dan menjadi diri aku sendiri bila berada dengan ko.
Terima kasih kerana tak pernah merungut atau mengeluh walaupun ko penat yang amat.
Terima kasih kerana buat aku ketawa walaupun aku tengah menangis.
Terima kasih kerana buat aku rasa aku bernyawa dan berharga.
Terima kasih kerana menjadi antara sahabat dan anugerah terbaik yang pernah aku miliki.

Aku tahu aku bukan seorang sahabat yang baik. Jadi aku ikhlas berterima kasih dan aku mahu ko tahu. Kau, aku dan insan lain adalah sebahagian dari cerita yang telah ditulis oleh Yang Esa. Kalau aku menutup mata lebih awal, aku bersyukur kepada Allah kerana pinjamkan aku dan beri aku peluang mengenali ko walaupun untuk masa yang singkat.

Semoga berkat dan rahmat Allah sentiasa bersama kau. Terima kasih sahabat.

p/s: Tuhan, tolong jaga dia...

Don't force me to like you.

2011-05-26T09:15:00.000-07:00

I've seen a husband slap her wife.

I've seen a brother kick his sister.

I've seen a dad beats his daughter and son.

I've seen a man shouted at a woman.

I've seen a guy made a girl cry.

I've seen people treated others like rubbish.

I've seen all those things.

Why does every single bad thing happen?

They can't control their anger and emotion.

I... can't stand with them.

That's not my world.

A reminder,

I won't marry a bad-tempered-guy. I swear.

Aku tak mahu merana seumur hidup!

And you, please

2011-05-23T20:11:00.000-07:00

take me to walk under the rain so that I won't see the reality.

There is a story of...

2011-05-21T02:13:00.000-07:00

There is a story of a man..
who always kept his feeling towards his friend
until the day she got married
He decided to tell the truth and..
she felt that it’s a good joke for her wedding

There is a story of a man..
who has never told his wife how much he loves her
until the day she passed away
until now, he keeps sending flowers to her grave everyday
with thousand kisses on the card saying ‘I Love You’..
But…
Would she be able to know?

There is a story of a girl…
who always needed a hug from her daddy
but she was too shy to ask for
until the day she can never hug him anymore..

Yet, there is a story of a girl..
who loves her bestfriend so much,
sharing a lot of joy together,
waiting for the day to meet,
but they can't make it even at once,
until the day she can never hear the laugh anymore...

A lot of stories happen everyday
You could know what had happen yesterday
How can you be sure what will happen tomorrow?
Think of something you never say..
Are you waiting until the day?

While you reading this,
if someone appears in your mind,
please do what you always want to do if you don’t want
to lose them...!

Tears are the silent language of grief

2011-05-20T00:35:00.000-07:00

Kata orang,
"Jangan ditangisi yang dah pergi, nanti roh arwah tak tenang"

Aku..
takkan menangis lagi..

Sahabat,
semoga rohmu tenang di sana,
doa dan bacaan yaasin akan selalu ku kirim hingga di akhir usia.

Tuhan,
pinjamkan mereka yang lain lebih lama,
sehingga aku di hujung nyawa..

Aku masih belum cukup kuat.. :(

Do you know how to curse?

2011-05-19T01:52:00.000-07:00

Tengahari tadi Hamzah kol aku. Dia cakap ade membe die gitaw yang Akim dah takde. Aku siap marah dia lagi, ingatkan dia main2. Mase tu aku tengah drive, tak sempat pikir ape pun. Aku terus balik umah, capai beg, gerak pegi airport. Memandangkan sekarang aku kat Kelantan, for sure flight la transport paling cepat sampai. Sumpah aku tak pikir ape pun, aku drive laju gile macam nak mati, aku tak tahu berapa kali aku langgar traffic light. Im sure semua kereta dok hon menyumpah lahanat kat aku. But I don't give a damn. Aku memang tak nampak hape dah. Aku kol adik aku sebab dia plg dekat ngan airport, suruh beli tiket on the spot. Dia siap tolong check in and take boarding pass. Ham aku suruh tunggu kat LCCT.

Tiket dah dapat, kol 3 boarding. Aku tak tau la kenapa jalan hari ni jam macam sial. Last2 aku on lampu emergency kereta dan hon berjuta kali suh depa kasik laluan. Last-last sempat jugak aku sampai kat airport. Boarding last kol 2.40 pm. Tu pun adik aku dah tercegat depan laluan nak pi kat flight. Aku sampai betul2 kol 2.42pm. Guard tu tak kasik masuk. Aku mengamuk macam orang gile kot. Staff die pun tak kasik masuk. Dia cakap flight dah nak gerak, tadi dah announce nama awk last call. Wth!! Ade 20 minit lg before flight betul2 berlepas, takkan tak leh kasik masuk langsung???

Aku memang kuar air mata, menangis abis ah. Seriously aku memang tak pernah menangis teruk macam ni, and aku memang persuade diorang gile babem. Aku siap bagitaw yang ni urgent case, ade kematian. Please be consider. Haram jadah diorang tak layan, siap marah aku balik. Okay fine aku taw aku salah sebab aku lewat sikit, but as a human can u consider others who really need a lil HELP??? Takde sense of humanity langsung. Aku tak patut panggil korang human, because your heart like the bloody stone. If it happens to be you, don't you expect the same? Are you a human or a dead zombie?

Semua orang kat airport pandang semacam kat aku. Ye la, dah la selekeh gile, datang sehelai sepinggang, bawak purse dengan handfon je, pastu dok bising2 kat situ. Sapa2 pun kutuk mengeji. Lantak depa la. Until the end, they didn't allow me to go in. Dahla tiket flight on the spot rm350+. Pastu tak kasi chance langsung kat aku. Burn bodo macam tu je. It's not about the money that shoul be considered.. I don't care if it cost until rm1000. But I do care when at last it's not worth at all just because of some stupid people. Macam sia-sia je. Aku tak tau aku terduduk menangis kat airport tu berapa lama, sampai la adik aku datang bagi tau parents aku tunggu kat luar. Yang pastinya lebih dari sejam...

Well you can say that how pathetic I am. It's not a queen drama or a target of any sympathy. Dah lama aku plan nak jumpa arwah. Tiap kali nak jumpa mesti ade je halangan. Susah gile nak make it possible. I don't know why. Aku terkilan sangat-sangat sebab arwah contact aku before dia koma, dia mintak maaf sebab baju yang aku tempah tu salah size. So dia terpaksa tempah balik. Aku cakap its ok, nanti aku tengok dulu. Boleh je nak pakai. He mentioned that : " Baju size ni terlampau kecik, macam baby-T. Takkan izma nak pakai baju baby-T, singkat nanti nampak pusat. Takpe akim tempah yang lain, ganti balik yang ni. " Dia mintak maaf gile2 ngan aku. Padahal baju ni hal kecik je. Siap mintak maaf lagi atas segala salah silap dia. Masa tu aku tak fikir buruk pape pun. Arwah pun ada janji nak jumpa aku kalau aku turun kl next week... Janji tinggal janji.. *sigh*

Last year my uncle was killed on the same date - 19th May. This year another friend is gone. I... I think Im getting phobia with this date. Hurm..

What's hurt me the most, sampai saat terakhir pun halangan itu menang...Pintaku, hanya untuk kali ini je. The last one.. Why??

Akim, semoga roh kamu dicucuri rahmat.. Al-fatihah..Thanks for being such a good friend even just for a short of time... Tak sangka Akim pergi dulu before Izma, in all of sudden.. Dah takde orang nak marah izma sebab selalu kol tak kena masa, dah tak akan dengar lagi gelak dan lawak bila izma merajuk, dah takde yang akan kasi nasihat pelik dan lucu, dah takde orang akan bagitau 'yang ni nanti Akim cite bile kite jumpe. haa yang tu pun nanti akim cite bile kite jumpe ek," dah takkan ade lagi orang tulis dekat shoutbox 'hi, telor datang bawak telor", dah takde lagi org akan back up izma kalau izma perang ngan izuari..dah takde yang akan marah dan kutuk sape yang buli izma, dah takde lagi komen baru akim kat status/wall & gambar...

Dah... dah tak boleh cakap lagi dah...

:'(

....................

Assyifa'

2011-05-18T19:17:00.000-07:00

I just got a bad news this morning. One of my friends was in the hospital because of the lung problem. He's still in coma, even he couldn't breathe by his own self.. I didn't know the exact condition of him, but from my humble opinion, I thought that he was in a critical situation. Urgh, if it's not because of my practical, for sure I'll be there to see him. Now I realize that Kelantan-KL is quite far. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Whatever it is, I pray to God in a hoping that he'll be okay and everything's going to be okay. Let us pray and make dua', 'selawat assyifa' for him. Allah Ya Kareem.

p/s: For some moments in life there's no words, when you realize that nothing makes the earth seems so spacious than having such a great friend by your side.

The Bright

2011-05-17T10:13:00.000-07:00

The colours that shimmer across earth's surface can surprise us. Colours, sometimes that 'disgusting and dull' can turn out to be 'surprising' and 'completely gorgeous'. Same goes to life. You are the one who coloured your own life. Thus, instead of having a dull and a plain one, why don't you try the bright and the outstanding?

"The world is your kaleidoscope, and the varying combinations of colors which at every succeeding moment it presents to you are the exquisitely adjusted pictures of your ever-moving thoughts." - James Allen

Truth and Faith

2011-05-17T07:55:00.000-07:00

"Allah has already written the names of your spouses for you. What you need to work on is your relationship with ALLAH SWT. He will send him/her to you when you are ready. It is only a matter of time."

Insha Allah.

Will you marry me?

2011-05-10T20:33:00.000-07:00

Pergh. Tajuk tak leh blah. Pheww~

I got a lot of wedding invitation cards from my friends! Hell yeah I'm over excited when it comes into this wedding matters especially the wedding of the person that I've known for years. Knowing that people around you find their soul mates plus the special person that they want to spend the rest of their life with is really a PURE BLISS!

In doing so, I need to list down all invitation so that I won't forget or miss out their joyful day. Leave out all works, journals and photo shoot invitation. I will make myself available for them as their day will be the once-in-all-history-event. I do hope so! Plz plz plz! Pardon me for being so over. Oh who cares? I don't give a damn. Hahaha.

EVENTS	DATE & TIME	DAY	FROM	VENUE
Wedding	14/05/2011 (12pm- 3pm)	Saturday	Najaa Najihah & Shah	Kota Bharu, Kelantan
Wedding	29/05/2011 (12pm-4pm)	Sunday	Kak Wani & Fuzaimie	Kg Pndan, Kuala Lumpur
Wedding	29/05/2011	Sunday	Kak Ain & Abg Mirul	Kuala Pilah, Negeri Sembilan
Wedding	02/06/2011 (8pm-11.30pm)	Thursday	Kak Hannan Al-Qudsey & Syed Ram	Dewan Jubli Intan, Johor Bahru
Wedding	03/06/2011 (10:00pm) 04/06/2011 (1:00pm)	Friday And Saturday	Wan Nurhafizah (Pijah)	Taman Mas Merah, Tanah Merah. Kelantan
Wedding	04/06/2011 (11:30am - 4:30pm)	Saturday	Ummi & Hamzah	Taman Koskam Kepala Batas, Malaysia
Wedding	05/06/2011 (12pm-11:30pm)	Sunday	Mohd Khairul Hisyham & Jenne	Pelabuhan Klang,Selangor
Wedding	05/06/2011 (11pm)	Sunday	Nini	Kg. Sematang Serdang, Perlis
Wedding			Alea’s Brother

p/s: Dear friends, if I miss any of your event do inform me in the comment box below. Oh my beloved followers and readers, do invite me in your wedding too! Thank you. Hope to see you all! Lots of love =)

New addiction

2011-05-10T06:07:00.000-07:00

16th May will be Teacher's Day!

I didn't sleep last night because I tried to finish sewing those 'manik' things on my new plain baju kurung.

Guess what?

I will wear it during this Teacher's Day in my school!

Happy Teacher's Day Izma =P

p/s: Just a simple advice. Sometimes we as women should learn the basic things such as cooking, sewing, house keeping and etc. Trust me it will be helpful in future ;-)

It will be okay

2011-05-10T02:14:00.000-07:00

soon.

Insha Allah.

Smile, comes to me.

Will you?

Lost

2011-05-07T08:26:00.000-07:00

in an ocean of sorrow.

Tears and shadows,
will you go?

La tahzan ya Izma, innallah hamaanna...

#Day 11 – Your dream wedding.

2011-05-05T10:08:00.000-07:00

I don't dream about wedding.

I don't have a dream wedding.

Wedding.

Not now.

Vintage Photography Contest!

2011-05-04T01:37:00.000-07:00

Do you like vintage? Do you like old style? Do you like classic tone?

Why don't you try to join this contest?

Maybe you are the one who will be on the top!

For more info, visit here.

HOW TO JOIN??

Follow her blog (it will be more easy to get the latest update of the contest)
Put the contest header in your entry.
Minimum picture that can be used : ONE and maximum - THREE.
The picture/pictures should look VINTAGE! (can be edit)
Use your own picture, do not use others.
You can use any picture of yourself, it doesn't matter if you don't have dslr picture or 'photo shoot' picture as long as you think that the picture is good enough for this contest.
You can use picture of yourself alone / together with your friends.
Put the link of your contest entry in the comment box below.
Then tag 3 of your friends.
Due date: 30th June 2011.
The prizes will be given to THREE winners with the best pictures.

Good luck! ;-)

Show Me Your Pose Photoshoot

2011-05-03T08:50:00.000-07:00

Do you still the remember our first contest of 'Show Me Your Pose'? I'm really sorry for delaying this entry. It's already in the draft but I forget to publish. Pardon me for that. Okay let me repeat again. Khairul Azkar, Faiz Khalil and I had organized a contest in our blog. This photoshoot session was a prize for both winners. Unfortunately K.A and Faiz couldn't make it because they had something came up all of sudden. So we decided to ask for some help from bro Shah Rol, Noza, Piko and Zaim. A special thanks for them cause' make this event success as we planned. Thank you so much to those who involved. Hope to see you again next time! ♥ ♥ Now let the pictures speak~

Location: KLCC Park

Wardrobe: Evagurl Izma

PHOTOGRAPHERS:

MAKE UP ARTIST (MUA)

Roshima Roslan

MODELS:

Introducing you Jamilah Jaafar!

and Wiwit Supriyatna!

Should I introduce this one? Nah. I don't think so :-P

BEHIND THE SCENE :

This is behind the scene video. Feel free to watch =)

That's all. You can visit their facebook and blogs for more photos. Thank you! Good night people.

#Day 10 – A photo of your favorite place to eat.

2011-05-03T06:11:00.000-07:00

Google for many times to find the picture of Swiss Oven Restaurant but seems like there's no picture available in the web except the picture of the menu. Luckily I found this picture in facebook.

Fyi, this restaurant is situated at : level 1, KL City Air Terminal, KL Sentral, 50470 Kuala Lumpur.

It was established on 21st August 2008. My favourite menu are Chicken Pillaf, Chocolate bread and Twisted Hazelnut bread. Well actually it is more like bakery than restaurant. The special about this restaurant is they provide high quality and unique bread and pastries freshly baked daily at the cafe. Check out their facebook here. Do have a try ;-)

Hours

Mon - Fri:	7:00 am	-	9:00 pm
Sat - Sun:	8:00 am	-	8:00 pm

Payment Options	Cash Only
Services	Takes Reservations Walk-Ins Welcome Good For Groups Good For Kids Take Out Delivery Catering

Phone	03-22603711 fax: 0322603712

Special entry for a beautiful girl

2011-05-02T11:04:00.000-07:00

Dear Mira,

Everybody knows...

You can't be all things to all people.

You can't do all things at once.

You can't do all things equally well.

You can't do all things better than everyone else.

Your humanity is showing just like everyone else's

So...

You have to find out who you are, and be that.

You have to decide what comes first, and do that.

You have to discover your strengths, and use them.

You have to learn not to compete with others,

Because no one else is in the contest of being YOU.

And then...

You will have learned to accept your own uniqueness.

You will have learned to set priorities and make decisions.

You will have learned to live with your limitations.

You will have learned to give yourself the respect that is due.

And you'll be a most unique and happy human being.

Always Believe...

That you are a wonderful, unique person.

That you are a once-in-all-history event.

That it's more than a right, it's your duty to be who you are.

That life is not a problem to solve, but a gift to cherish.

And you'll always be able to stay one up on what used to get you down!

p/s: Takmo sedih2 lg okay? =)

#Day 9 – Your current relationship, if single discuss how single life is.

2011-05-01T23:51:00.000-07:00

Current relationship???

Oh. I'm single.

How single life is?

To be honest, sometimes I did feel alone especially when I was not in a good condition yet I needed someone to talk to. However, I still have family and friends to share with. So it's not a deal at all right?

Straight to the point. Being single means that you have your own life and privacy to think about. In fact, you have to think triple and make your own decision. What I mean here is I have to be independent and decide everything by my own. Before I broke up with my ex, I used to ask his opinions, suggestions or share with him although it was the small thing/matter. So, when I'm single, I don't have him to refer to and I have to take a risk, come up with my own responsibility. Then I learn how to be independent and mature. Everytime I face some kind of difficult situation, I will list down all pro and cons before I choose the best decision/result. Alhamdullilah, after a long time, I manage to cope with a lot of situation alone. Actually it is HIM who always give me strength and help me through the ways. Thanks God, thanks dear lovely family and friends. (being emotional for a minute. lol )

Umm.. what else?

Oh. I'm single, so I'm free to do anything that I want. No more heart feeling. In other words, no more heart to take care off.

One last thing. Nak korek hidung pun takde orang kisah.

Babai.

Rintihan Al-Quran

2011-04-30T10:26:00.000-07:00

Sejauh manakah abad telah berlalu? Sepantas manakah usia dimamah beku...? Sekian apakah yang telah merentap keinsafan di dada insan, hingga lena tak pernah mengah menjamah alpa dan kaku? Perlukah rintihan ini bergema, kerana suaranya tak pernah meresap tangkai jiwa, sekalipun usia dunia sedekad demi sedekad berputar.. Perlukah untuk sebuah rintihan ini, melagukan kekesalan, atas setiap kealpaan yang tak pernah usang di mata insan.. Hakikatnya, manusia tetap memandang lesu, pada kalam suci, wahyu Ilahi ini...!!

Terlupakah duhai insan, tatkala Jibril mendakap erat Rasul junjungan, Kalam Suci ini yang diucapkan! Terlupakah duhai insan, tatkala dakapan dileraikan, kalam suci ini jua yang diungkapkan... dan masih terlupakah duhai insan, tatkala bergetar tubuh Rasul pilihan, kalam ini jua menjadi penguat sebuah keresahan!! Andai bisa kau dengar duhai insan, betapa diri ini merintih sayu, tatkala debu-debu berterbangan, menutup seribu bahasa keindahan, yang terkandung dalam kalimah dan wahyu suci ini... Andai bisa kau dengar duhai insan, betapa diri ini terkilan untuk sebuah kealpaan yang terhidang hingga Kalam Ilahi ini tertutup rapat tanpa sebuah sentuhan...

pic from Google

Untuk apa ku jadi pilihan... Seandainya sekadar ditonton segenap keindahan?? Untuk apa kujadi pilihan, seandainya sekadar untuk disimpan..?? Dan untuk apa Kalam Suci ini memenuhi segenap ruangan, seandainya sekadar suatu perhiasan..?? Aduhai yang bergelar insan, tidakkah terlintas di hati kalian, untuk menggemakan alam dengan suara-suara melafazkan Kalam Suci Tuhan...?? Tidakkah terasa kekerdilan, kerana segenap makhluk Tuhan tak pernah alpa melagukan pujian dalam versi kesyukuran dan keinsafan...?? Aduhai malangnya! Umat terakhir ini sering dilapah kelalaian.. Sedangkan usia dunia, sejengkal, belum pasti kau bisa bertahan...

Ya Tuhan, dalam rintihan kudus ini, betapa sunyinya sebuah kitab suci ini, tanpa suara yang ingin melafazkan kalimah-Mu..Betapa sebuah kitab suci ini, merindukan segenap suasana dalam sirah terdahulu... Bila Rasul dan para sahabat berlumba-lumba mengejar ma'rifat, bersatu memohon maghfirullah, mengucapkan Kalam-kalam suci ini tanpa ada lena yang membekukan jiwa! Aduhai insan... seandainya, terpanggil jiwa dan dirimu, mendakap sebuah Kitab Suci ini, alunkanlah segenap suara, membaca perutusan Tuhan, menjenguk sebuah keinsafan, kerna tiada seindah bahasa, seelok pujangga, sebenar-benar kalimah, melainkan sebuah kitab, yang tertulis di dalamnya Al-Quran... Wahyu Ilahi... Padanya ada jutaan makna tersimpan, dan sebuah yang tertulis Al-Quran jua, merintih untuk segenap kealpaan insan, membiarkannya usang, ditelan masa dan arus kekosongan,tanpa suara keinsafan!!

p/s:
Siapa kata aku berpaling dari bahasa ibundaku,
walhal darah aku masih Melayu.
Siapa bilang aku lupa agamaku,
walhal jiwa aku masih pada Yang Satu.

#Day 8 – A picture of your favourite memory

2011-04-28T07:25:00.000-07:00

Wedding. The first wedding of our cohort (batch). One by one is getting married soon. Alhamdulillah. May God bless us all. Barakallah..

Check this out!!

2011-04-27T00:26:00.001-07:00

http://sumptuous-sweetie.blogspot.com/

will upload more soon ;)

#Day 7 – A photo of an animal you’d love to keep as a pet.

2011-04-26T00:47:00.000-07:00

pic from Google

I once had a cat as my pet, named Shiro. However it was died because of the accident. Since that, I never kept any cat. I wish I can have one, maybe in future after I have my own house. I miss Shiro so much. Luckily I still keep a video of it..

Good bye Shiro.. :'(

#Day 6 – A song to match your mood.

2011-04-24T22:43:00.000-07:00

I have to be a baby-sitter for a week because my aunt has some work to do and she's 'out-station'.

Mood: love towards children

Song: Raju Chacha (my cousin love this song so much even she doesn't understand the lyric)

Bum Chik Bum Bum Bum Chik Bum Bum
Raju Chacha Come Come Come

Aaye Gaye Kitne Mausam
Rasta Dekhe Hum
Welcome Raju Chacha Come Come Come

Na Police Inspector Tu
Na Koi Director Tu
Jo Bhi Hai Tu Teri Kasam
Tere Jaise Dekhe Kum
Raju Chacha Come Come Come
Find More lyrics at www.sweetslyrics.com

Sabko Tera Intezaar
Sabka Dil Hai Bekraar
Tu Sabka Sab Tere Yaar
Tere Dil Mein Pyar Hi Pyar
Yeh Duniya Hai Ek Atom Bomb
Raju Chacha Come Come Come

Din Ko Hum Na Royenge
Raat Ko Chain Se Soyenge
Sab Yeh Baat Karte Hain
Tauba Tauba Karte Hain
Bhoot Bhi Tujhse Darte Hain
Tu Aaye To Phir Kya Gham
Hum Sab Naache Cham Cham Cham
Raju Chacha Come Come Come
Raju Chacha Raju Chacha
Raju Chacha We Love You

#Day 5 – What makes you different from everyone else?

2011-04-24T01:47:00.000-07:00

Stubborn
Voice like toad
Can make lots of facial expression at the same time
Can smile eventhough my heart cry
'Jongang' teeth
Can carry out many different characters in one photo shoot
Non-stop laughing until u pull my ears out
Good listener but not a good talker
Secretive and talkative
Forgetful but remember unimportant things very well

p/s: I'm not special, I'm just a limited edition.

Day 4 – Your favorite photograph of your best friend.

2011-04-22T23:51:00.000-07:00

Bestfriend? Another part of me. Her name is Wajihah. I met her during Samrah Fashion Show and we became closed. We did share a lot of things as we were also from the same university. It's quite a long time that I didn't see her. We were so busy with our studies and modeling job. Now she has graduated from iium. I don't know whether I will be able to see her anymore. I miss her :'(

Btw, I like this picture because we both smile like a colgate-final-model-search. Hahaha. If you notice, I rarely smile in any photo. Normally fashion photography does not really encourage you to smile except when you have to shoot for the happy environment and flowery dress. Do you get what I mean? I think I look funny when I smile because I have a kind of 'gigi berlapis'. I still remembered that one of my friend said : "Gigi hang maju ke depan". Lol. Whatever it is, I'm grateful with what God gave me =)

Wajihah, may God bless you in everything that you do. Although the going gets rough, always believe that you are tough enough to make it. I love you <3